You do have to watch Jersey Shore, though

Jesus is the Derek Jeter of Christianity
Mose's return to The Office, B-
FJM's return to Deadspin, A

Also - Mark Strong in the first of these boring Sherlock Holmes movies

We're allowed to be sexist in the Mad Men comments, right?
I'd like to tickle the innards of Elisabeth Moss!

This CD
is minor Daniels

But can we also all agree that James Gray was one of the most wonderful and singular American filmmakers of this past decade and that Phoenix was legitimately great in all of the movies they did together?

Wait, isn't it clearly "got no war to name us"?

No play for Mr. Gray!
Re-jected!

Uh…
diabetes repair?

And you're just not a fan of funny movies in general, right, ZODIAC? What's the deal with that?

ZODIAC MOTHERFUCKER, I meant that Edgar Wright knows how to frame a shot so that it's inherently funny in and of itself, which is something most comedic directors don't even bother with. q

YEAH EDGAR WRIGHT BLOWS IN FACT EDGAR WRIGHT IS BLOWING YOUR FUCKING WIFES DICK AS I TYPE THIS SHIT SO WHY DONT YOU TAKE YOUR WACK AS FUCK CANDY ASS AND BACK THE FUCK OFF JUST BECUASE YOU CANT APPRECIATE GAGS BASED ON THE CLEVER FRAMING OF SHOTS OR A NONSTOP BARRAGE OF BRITISH WITTICISMS DOESNT MEAN ANYBODY ELSE WANTS…

She's going to attach dynamite to her son's head a la The Generalissimo

The worst thing that ever happened to me was on Christmas. Oh, God. It was so horrible. It was Christmas Eve. I was 9 years old. Me and Mom were decorating the tree, waiting for Dad to come home from work. A couple hours went by. Dad wasn't home. So Mom called the office. No answer. Christmas Day came and went, and…

One recent movie that nailed what it feels like to be high was A Serious Man in that scene where the main character's son is getting bar mitzvah'd

So anyway what's the deal with every man shaving his chest these days?
I don't mean to put Mark Wahlberg on the spot, that's the last thing I'd wanna do, but seriously, everybody. I was at the beach last week and I felt so uncomfortable the whole time because I was the only guy there with hair below the neck. This is…

I just watched Two Lane Blacktop for the first time by the way, Warren, and it's one of the best things I've seen all year

Well, Popeye is one of my favorite movies and it's actually gotten somewhat of a critical reappraisal the past ten years or so. You know, it's just delightful and droll and it has this tremendous sense of community and warmth. It's also ostensibly a film for children, even though all the subtext is dealing in economic…

1/4th of the greatest defensive infield of all time!

How about Edgardo Alfonzo?