So by this logic, Cookie Monster is Henry Clay or something?

And even with new-found antigravity powers you will never, ever be able to cross the threshold of a bar/restaurant again.

@avclub-270d77e3ac5afbd3479de45c24205f2c:disqus Yea, its not like the House Majority leader actually used the phrase "Jew me down" while debating on the House floor yesterday or anything. OH WAIT http://newsok.com/oklahoma-…

Just remembered that one of my roommates used to get his hair cut at said manslaughterin' sister's salon in a certain college town.

@Scrawler2:disqus As a native, I will proudly attest there are about 10 square miles in midtown/downtown Tulsa that could be mistaken for an actual city.

I was there today! I heard a powerful elected official proudly refer to resisting federal regulations as creating "Pockets of Freedom."

You're forgetting about the GAP band and much, much less popular/more handsome commenter Super Nintendo Chalmers.

"Mosquitoes back then even ate the blood of DINAH-SAWERS!"

Of course. Aisha Tyler is a great idea too but if PFT could get some exposure to housewives in mid-'merica between now and then he could actually overtake Seth Meyers as the logical favorite from a comedy and business standpoint.

DOPE IDEA BUT AYO PERETTI TOO RAW FOR NETWERK

@avclub-518aedbf95e34c72567f82fd1ad92f76:disqus  Before I moved back home, I would cause minor panics when I took phone calls from my more country friends after a few drinks. "How are things back in Oooaak-Le-Hooowma?"

@yahoo-4P3LYKST5PDEESQ6U3AVSN3BKI:disqus "Be not children in understanding. Be you children in malice, but in understanding be men."

@avclub-5bbc67c39fbdf1c74e28b86c595f6e4a:disqus absolutely. Every (real life) football player with half a brain eventually realizes that they are at best replaceable equipment and at worst cattle, even at the high school level. The fact that 16 year-olds can get a standing ovation for concussing another child is…

Seriously. It's hard to find an article of clothing that costs $2K or more that makes you look like either a maitre'd or an extra from Minority Report.

And while Rose Leslie is an absolute knockout as Ygritte, if I had seen her at this event I likely would've walked straight into a damn wall after tripping over my jaw.

Doubtful. LIU-Brooklyn is pretty unlikely to win the NCAA tournament.

I don't know if you're familiar with the airport drivel of Clive Cussler, but I read more than one of his books as a younger lad.

Oh god that sax. I can tell from upstairs if a Lethal Weapon movie just came on TNT, TBS, etc.

As someone that has to wear a suit every day,there are downsides.  Namely, it ain't cheap, you need to change if  you want to go anywhere remotely hipstery/divey after work (lest you be JUDGED), and occasionally men several years or decades your senior will call you "sir" in a tone that implies they are doing so only…

Dear Zachary wrecked me. It definitely belongs in the "glad I saw it, will never see it again" category. Though that may be partially due to the fact that I had also just seen Blue Valentine and Melancholia within a two week period.  Which may be indicative of a larger problem altogether.