"On closer inspection, that's a tumor."

That photo reminded me why I don't pick up hippie chicks. Thanks for the timely warning, AV Club!

It's gonna take her forever to get that Slip'n'Slide ready if she does it that way.

Gordon Bennett, would you Adam and Eve it?

Chim chim cher-ree!

What ho, this blighter's a proper stick-in-the-mud!

Grumpy Cat
Makes me lol,
Numbers at the Super Bowl!
We didn't start the fire *bang* dead

I was hoping for someone to reply with "A nickel?" in all caps, but your Plan B sounds good so I'm going with it.

Meanwhile, down a dark alley, a shady character in a fedora and trenchcoat is selling slightly used letter Ls for a nickel.

I'm not seeing a promble here.

Is that kid wearing a hair-hat? Or does he have a strangely elongated, conical head?

Feh, he didn't even use it for one hour.

I hope that one day I, too, shall piss off at least one of the Eagles.

I'm burned out on Star Wars threads, so I'm just gonna say this:

I'm glad he specified skeletal muscle, because dying of heart failure from jerking off too much would be embarrassing.

I did, until I got near the end. Mondale was always an electrifying public speaker.

Strangely enough, he was never called on it.

Pro tip: this trick also works on black people. Mwah-hah-hah.

"True, but". Catholic confirmed.

That many?