Also, JFK's father was a legendary pussy hound who brought up his sons with the strong belief that if they weren't having sex all the time with as many women as possible, they were doing it wrong.

You're not a loser! You're in the audio visual club!

Hey, California got to have Jerry Brown as governor a second time. The universe has delivered on most, if not all, of its Jerry Brown-related requests.

By 'here', let me guess - Australia?

That's what scares me the most. By and large, wealthy liberals in blue states will get through this just fine. It's the elderly, the vulnerable, the minorities and in general, the people who have trouble speaking up, who will bear the brunt of Trumpism.

Another thing that occurs to me: any kind of mind altering substance can blur the lines of consent.

SOS started in 1912, so I'm pretty sure her handlers consider it the work of Satan and make her use CQD just like in the good old days.

Some were. Several of my cousins, all in their late twenties and early thirties, were proud Trump voters.

Huh. I can't even tell reality from satire anymore.

From what I understand about the recount situation, what Jill Stein is proposing is not a post-election audit (where they examine the processes used in the election to find systemic shortcomings - and in fact has already taken place in several swing states) but a straight recount, where ballots that are unclear are…

Right? That's gross. I can't believe the guy never thought that his stinky undercarriage might have something to do with her not wanting to blow him.

I've come to the conclusion that Dan was high as a kite while writing this week's column. All of his advice is lazy-assed and not very helpful.

Well, that's a little reductive. Sex is enjoyable for all sorts of reasons. Orgasms are just one of them.

Dan's advice this week is terrible. Has he just given up in the wake of the Trumpocalypse? Or perhaps he's super high?

Stone's Ginger Wine, all the way.

Road House.

Also, that was originally George Lucas' plan, so there would be a nice sense of symmetry.

Spy want cookies!

In the future, all reggae tracks will be by Bob Marley. Including anything by UB40.

Boone's Farm? Good grief! JUST SAY NO!