Ke$ha and Katy Perry are basically mirror images of each other (the Black Swan of pop music, if you will): one dresses "trashy" with a voice heavily auto-tuned to hide the fact that she can't really sing, one dresses "sexy" with a voice heavily polished to disguise the fact that she can't really sing. It's common…

I hear Pitchfork gave breathing a 10.0. You should stop breathing — that'll show those hipsters what's what!

Poor Sean Young
It's too bad she won't lutz. But then again, who does?

So if some hypothetical unhip person [looks around nervously] hasn't picked up Body Talk 1 or 2, you're saying that it's worth buying the full Body Talk compilation rather than getting them individually?

How come none of the cockfights I've seen were lit so beautifully?

You're an inspiration to the children of the world.

I don't know if you've heard of Robin Williams, but he does an impression of a black guy that'll really make you think.

Listen to this dispatcher, it'll totally change your life.

When the past few seasons someone eat it.

She is a solid 7.

I'd add something, but I'm late for my Jai Alai match.

Adding a new character named Pucci?
I can't tell if that's a winking reference by the writers or just a delightful coincidence.

Don't you think I know better than to praise U2 round these parts? Darlene Love.

If it's diversity you want, there's always "Santa Claus is a Black Man."

I'd add "Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)" to that list, Jorge. I don't understand how anyone with a heart couldn't love that song.

They could change the lyrics to "You scumbag, you larva / You cheap electric car-va."

Hold on a second…
I was going to remark how strange it was that Hee Haw was on the air in 1986, but Wikipedia tells me that it was still airing until 1992, which is rather mind-boggling.

All-Star?

…And remember, future profanities such as these will affect you in the future.

Please refrain from discussing or engaging in any inter-office BLEEP or BLEEP-ing, or finger BLEEP or BLEEP-sting or BLEEP-esting or BLEEP-eing or BLEEP or even BLEEP. Oh, and if anyone tries anything with my sister Lindsay, I'll take off my pants, I'll show you my BLEEP, and I'll personally BLEEEEEEEEEEEEEP.