Don't forget the token black dude.

You may not have heard.  There is now this thing called the Information Superhighway.

No.  Beavis and Butthead was a lot more cerebral. A lot more.

Three Burly Chickenhawks, One Chicken - The latest reality show from Bravo!

I claim zis chest in de name of Frrahnce!

Which one of the staffers is trying to get in this chick's pants?  Or, is AVClub involved in some sort of Internet payola?  Inquiring minds want to know.

After Queef
Sorry.

Y'know Parents just don't understand.  However, they will on occasion nepotistically mount a $130 mill blockbuster to give your career a boost.  For your birfday.

You keep talkin with that sass mouth and you'll get both of your legs broken.

Will Joe Estevez be in the movie too?  Or is he tied up in "Werewolf 2" pre-production?

The AV Block Party: It's OK, but it's like you died and woke up in Hipster Heaven.

DORKS! GEEKS!

Wunderbahr!!

America, truly, is now a land of broken dreams. Truly.

The science of fecal sustenance is still in its infancy. I won't believe it until I see empirical proof.  Surely there are at least one or two German scientist pioneers in this field.

"A fat woman came into the shoe store today………."

I wonder if she would like to make $14…….

You know what was a good song? That one that went…
Don't stop. Get It. Get It.
Don't stop. Rock wit it. Doodoo Brown!

Apparently their high school guidance counselor failed to mention that dork rocker was not an in-demand career field.  These kids today are too lazy and I got no sympathy.  You want some cash, go and stand at the highway off-ramp with misspelled cardboard signage like everybody else.

"The clock struck two,
my aorta shot its goo…