Grandpa Bauer
I am really enjoying Jack's tendency towards calling people "son" this season. But I liked Jack's threat even more tonight. Jack should just threaten people and give them the Bauer Eye as an interrogation technique more.

Goddammit, Burton. The book came out TUESDAY. Are you even done reading it? Or do you just snap up scripts based on "quirkiness" factors? So… let's see…

Don't forget Helena Bonham Carter.

I'm scared to watch. I'm just so very frightened that Avatar will win Best Picture. If that happens and I'm not watching, I can deal with it; but if that happens while I'm watching it live and I have to listen to James Cameron's acceptance speech, I might break my hand punching a wall.

Maybe now Tim can go on a vision quest to find himself and learn he should never remake/adapt another movie.

Zooey Deschanel is several shades too pale to be Mary Anne.

Oh God. You just made me realize that the trailer for this movie will contain at least one Lost joke. The movie, possibly more.

The climax of the film comes when the hero blasts THROUGH HIS OWN SHIELD to get the invaders.

That would leave many questions about what many of the 815-ers have done to piss Smokey off. I hope that's not the answer. Because if so, we're going to need explanations for what folks like the 815's pilot and Eko did. Because they definitely didn't knife Smokey.

Kara dressed as Paula?
Kara IS Paula. She already gives false hope to bad contestants and she's picked out her clear favorite to win. All she needs to do is throw in more random nonsensical gibberish whenever she talks, and the transformation is complete!

In retrospect, I'm pretty sure Dogen said that just to keep Sayid from being swayed by that silver-tongued smoke monster. Although I'd love to see the DVD bonus where Sayid actually does stab Smokey before he can get a word out and Smokey explodes. Roll credits. I'd buy the hell out of that DVD.

I think the biggest discrepancy is that alterna-Walt is far older than his normal timeline self. HEYOOOOO.

Ben definitely didn't make it into the Panic Room, but seeing as how he wasn't in the final shot with the Army of Darkness (HAHA I'M SO CLEVER), I'm presuming he's hanging around an empty Temple. Or he found some other way out.

On the subject of CTU's building watch
I think the thing that made me the most mad about this episode isn't that no one was outside the hospital, it's that Jack couldn't run down the kid who was hobbling along with a broken leg.

I wouldn't really blame Vonn for all the media being focused on her. I mean, sure, she's been in the limelight like crazy, but I don't think she's actively trying to make herself a star. I think that NBC is just saying "Here's a fairly attractive skiing chick! Market the shit out of her and get some teenage boys…

I thought the girls were just generic as hell. No one was overwhelmingly good or bad. But then again, I missed most of the second hour for Lost. Even if the guys were worse, they at least changed things up.

Regardless of singing talent
The entire Casey James segment was great, if only for the fact that everybody basically just gave up on judging and made things into the Kara Komedy Hour. Oh, that was grand. I really like the part where Kara mentioned she was married and I could imagine Mr. DioGuardi hanging himself.

Well, Jack has professed a new love…
…Who wants to start the betting on when Renee dies? I got big bucks on 9 AM!

If I may channel Zodiac Motherfucker…
Is nobody gonna mention the OWNAGE that was Jack entering the interrogation room? BAUER COMES UP, THROAT PUNCHES THE GUARD, USES HIS HAND PRINT TO GAIN ACCESS, AND SLAMS THE INTERROGATOR INTO THE WALL.

Yeah, Agent Prinze apparently decided if he was going to work in New York, he should sound like it. In the most stereotypical way possible.