Nuh uh!

I haven't read that article. I don't plan to.

It was a reflection of her elevated status in Riverdale's surprisingly lively organized crime community.

My preference is for it to end with Archie calling in his old crossover buddy Frank Castle, who then wipes out all the zombies in minutes with a machine gun.

Hang on, are we going to get a separate Newswire for every single show that is or is not coming back? Did they lock the staff in the office overnight again?

Whoof, sounds like a whole lot of soapy bullshit.

On how many earths?

But the perfect time to shoot some Guardians Vol. 2 promotional shorts about the comical adventures of Simon Williams, clueless movie star/superhero!

Oh no, the last thing we need is another thinkpiece on the historical use of greenface.

Big Bang Theory makes CBS giant bags of money, so they can afford to spend slightly smaller bags of money on it. Supergirl did not, so they're feeling less generous vis-a-vis bags of money.

I just finished the Canterbury Tales, and man, medieval people were really really obsessed with women's sexual virtue. Almost all the stories are about cheating wives or the fear of same. Good thing we in the modern world are all so much more enlightened and progressive, and women don't have their bodies constantly…

I've lately been rewatching Animaniacs and Young Justice via Netflix. Fun times.

In that case, may I offer you the opportunity to lend me a few thousand bucks at zero interest?

A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H, I got a gal
In Kalamazoo!
Don't want to boast but I know she's the toast
Of Kalamazoo-zoo-zoo-zoo-zoo-zoo-zoo!

What makes a man turn neutral? Lust for gold? Power? Or were you just born with a heart full of neutrality?

Bedbugs. Fuck bedbugs. I'd been getting bug bites now and then over the past couple weeks, and then this weekend I caught one of the little fuckers red-handed on my bathroom wall. The good news is that our landlord will pay for exterminators. The bad news is that apparently my roommate and I will have to prep by…

Yep, that was the exact point where I checked out on that game too.

I love the Sly Cooper series dearly, but the first game had a few rough patches that made that love hard-won. The core of the game was Sly's acrobatic sneaking and fighting from the beginning, but they hadn't quite nailed the right mix of alternate playstyles that the sequels got down to a science. So the game's…

I thought Fudd's voice sounded different on that line, and now I know why! Thanks, Internet person!

Magic helmet?