I can't believe I missed this review.  I watched this the first weekend it was out, and I made it through about 3.2 episodes before I gave up.  I have never, and I say this as a man who owns copies of Ed Wood movies that even he was ashamed of,  I have never seen such uninspired tripe in all my life. 
 
I went into it…

They should have done something with Monroe other than turn him into a sad sack who's just acting out cause he's lonely without his buddy. : (

Don't watch Hemlock Grove.  Now, I know when people say things like that, it's like saying "don't smell this rancid milk", and it just piques curiosity.  Let me dissuade you of that now.  Don't bother.  It's not So Bad It's Good, or So Bad It's Funny, or even So Bad It's Sad.  I think the best spin I can put on it is…

As far as commercial success goes, it's always been a popularity contest.  The very best bands are the ones that score a top 10 hit, which brings attention to the 3 albums they've struggled to showcase which show the full scope of their talent.  The reason we like them is because they are good, but the only reason we…

He's working on it.  Step One:  Obtain mastery over the laws of Astrophysics.

Yes, exactly.  And I watched this (well, as much as I could) because I figured Roth would know enough to double down on the gore and gratuitous sex when he should have absolutely no restrictions, or at least the same level of freedom HBO offers.  But the gore we get that isn't implied off-screen is so terribly dulled…

I haven't seen any of it, and I'm probably judging it harshly.  I've had a pretty bad taste in my mouth since The Ricky Gervais Show.  I found it about as funny as those three 14 year olds who sat behind me during Evil Dead laughing at their own running commentary while intermittantly stopping to call each other…

Hemlock Grove - A bar so low that even Ricky Gervais making fun of mentally challenged people can clear it.

Netflix has exclusive rights to broadcast in America.  Like Hulu with Misfits or BitTorrent with Doctor Who.

Shut up, you pinhead! You make me sick!

I've seen only one full season of American Idol, and he was on it.

Click Here To Continue.
Are you over 21? __Yes __No

Money.

This stupid, stupid idea that someone can JUDGE a singer by turning his back on him, and missing out on proper contact, is, to me, a fatuous nonsense.
That's why you hate The Voice?  Not because there isn't a genuine talent within 100 miles of that stage, or because it's a glorified karaoke contest/carnival sideshow…

Man, I miss those.

Satan?

I was just saying to myself, "Chancellor, why doesn't American Idol replace Nicki Manaj with Debbie Gibson?  That seems like a solid choice."

Season 2 will have the nanobots develop a collective consciousness and become the primary antagonist.  Season 3 will be a 4 camera sitcom with the nanobots and Charlie as a pair of mismatched roommates, and what this?  A baby left on the doorstep?  #sixseasonsandamovie

No, because metric. 

I always thought it was because they don't really have "seasons" the way we do, like Fall Prime Time and Summer Replacement and such.  They just make some shows, and then maybe they'll make some more later.  I could be way off on that, though.