OF CLOCK!

Awww. Brandis is dead now. Don't mock his terrible acting.

For sure. Also better than, "If we hold hands in a circle, then everything will stop!"

Why would being transgender make sex seem more disgusting?

Are you forgetting that scene where Patrick jerks off Henry? Handjobs count!

God help him. He looks like a time-traveled Willem Dafoe with mushface. Also, here is Willem Dafoe looking like Henry Bowers! http://content6.flixster.co…

I will never forgive 1080p and digital remastering for rendering the original It hilarious instead of terrifying. All the claymation looks so much worse with that level of detail. On a shitty, static-filled tube TV, it didn't necessarily look realistic, but it looked real enough to be scary. In 1080p, it's just…

Oh, I thought multiple partners was the only requirement for a gangbang. I guess I need to watch more porn to get the industry jargon down.

This is like the 80th time I've been relieved that I've never done cocaine.

I read this scene when I was 12 and still thought most boys were gross. But it made absolute sense. The grackles and loons singing in the woods. It felt dreamlike and right.

Have you tried turning It off and on again?

I honestly like the idea of having an attractive villain. One of my issues with the Star Wars series is that the main evil dude is always a mega-uggo. If it were a mega-hottie, I could understand the appeal, but I don't understand an impressionable ingenue looking at Palpatine and saying, "Yeah, I want to look like…

I don't understand this joke. Please explain it in excruciating detail.

I miss those things so much.

WHERE DO HODORS GO?

This, so much. Because Damon is self-aware and Stefan is not.

It happens like once a season and it gets stupider every time.

Confession: while you guys were watching Caroline accept her Mom of the Year medal, I was having a quickie. Can't say I'm sorry I missed that scene. I imagine skipping it means I enjoyed this episode more than all of you.

Stefan's entire dialogue can now be summed up as follows: "I'm not an asshole! You're an asshole!" Repeat ad infinitum.

Haha! I'm pretty sure Damon named Boaty McBoatface as well.