Because caucus.

Correct.

I know, right???

OMG, this is literally the same thing I’ve been thinking about him. Except it’s Phase 1: Lose nomination, Phase 2: ?, Phase 3: Win nomination.

Or your coworker leaves his Facebook open and you just go on a spree of liking a bunch of really random, awkward pages like My Little Pony and the Confederate flag. Not that I’ve done that...

I’ve known since he used to host an annoying morning radio show in DC.

Agreed. I feel like Bess gets a bad rap as a Fussy McFussypants, though. I mean, her friends did keep putting her into dangerous situations. Also, like Bess, I am a big fan of food.

I’ll take “Current U.S. Presidents” for $1000, please, Alex.

And would also do a much better job.

Never having to attend another Seder at Rubio’s office?

Speaking as a really bad half-Jew, Dayenu is the only song that matters. We always used children’s Haggadot, some of which were badly photocopied and missing pieces here and there. My uncles got progressively worse and worse at hiding the fact that they were sipping Elijah’s wine, and it always got to where everyone…

Seconded.

I saw you drink Elijah’s wine! I saw it!

She’s fundraising for down-ticket races (Clooney fundraiser) to help flip the House and Senate, while Bernie’s sniping at her for using the system, though, so...

Ohmygod, YES! The “Silent Majority” bullshit is driving me crazy. Like, dudes, you don’t know what either of those words means.

Same! Breathed a huge sigh of relief when I read it again and realized I was mistaken.

You’re not kidding. The first time I got it, I had flu-like symptoms for a couple of days afterwards. The second time, I was fine the next day, but right after the injection, my blood pressure dropped like a rock and I almost passed out. Fun times!

She was phenomenal in The Danish Girl. It was an incredibly moving performance.

Shhh, just allow nature to take its course.

Kelly Clarkson is a goddamn national treasure and I am deeply sorry that I ever rooted for Justin Guarini.