Normally I’d roll my eyes at “First!” but this was pretty good.

Fast food is for people who want cheap calories or who just like the food for whatever reason — nostalgia, poor taste, etc. (Sorry not sorry. :P ) . The people who enjoy McDonald’s don’t want to vary from what they like. The people who need McDonald’s because it’s inexpensive and anything that raises prices is bad for…

The craze is over, but the Overton Window of Food moved. Impossible/Beyond meat substitutes are now available just about everywhere. It’s no longer kind of weird to order them. You can buy them in your local big box market. Etc.

As someone incredibly late to this party, I didn’t know what a Carolina Squat was, and ideas ran through my mind of anything from “a weird new gay sex position” to “maybe it’s an exercise thing?” to “oh right, Jalopnik, I didn’t see the URL, this is a car thing.” XD

The Gawkerverse ads are racist, lol. When I go onto any of the other blogs, I don’t see HUGE OBTRUSIVE ADS blocking my view of the actual website in a way I don’t know how to remove. On the Root, I get big slabs of ad from the top of the screen that doesn’t have a close button... Anyway, fuck Kemp, he sucks.

But like...why not both? Self-righteousness is really annoying. Factory farming is bad. These are not mutually exclusive.

Definitely only nitpick that hard if you have an allergy or something.

I’m not sure why we’re obligated to not kill animals when if you’ve seen any nature documentary ever, nature is way more brutal than we will ever be. Hyenas eat their prey before it’s dead, and they start intestines first. Crocodiles grab on and spiral you into the water — drowning is the least painful of your worries…

My issue is with people telling me that a fundamentally pleasurable thing about the world — food I eat — is something harmful and I have to stop. I don’t care that I’m killing a cow. I have literally hunted my own food before, I know how this works.

I’ve discovered also why wedding cakes taste weird. They use this waxy “meringue” frosting instead of the super-sweet buttercream you get on like, sheet cakes and stuff. :P

Strawberry and Cherry are red, and red looks like blood. (I assume she’s getting an endoscopy thing or similar? That’s what I had, and I had the same rules.) IDK why Orange is allowed, maybe it doesn’t seem as bloody as red or purple?

Wait, Surge still exists?!

So I’m not crazy, and Coke Zero no longer tastes as good as it did before? Vindicated.

They’re not the same. They have different flavors in them.

I go to coffee shops not for coffee, which I’m fine at making, but for chai lattes, which I somehow suck at. I’ve tried brewing chai tea in milk. Too thick and kinda bitter. I’ve tried half milk half water. Too, well, watery. I’ve tried frothing. Doesn’t help. What is the absolute magic behind coffee shop chai lattes?

Fun oblique fact: most soy sauce you try is bullshit made in steel vats, and the practice of making old-style soy sauce is rapidly dying. There’s like one company that still makes the wooden vats for shoyu fermentation, and anyone who wants to brew their own shoyu has like no idea how to make or repair the vats. It’s…

I think we should go full paper. Plastic is fucking up the oceans. That said, paper bags are hard to carry en masse. Their handles rip, and they break easily. You have to bring a cart if you have a lot, or a vehicle.

It’s also a way to massively parallelize checking out. You can fit like ten of those things in a space where you can fit three cashiers with belts. People with giant carts who are going to waste my time, end up in the belt lanes. I and my three things are going to the self-checkout, where I can pay in ten seconds and…

If you’re going to ask for friends to chip in for an event, just do it ahead of time. “Hey, I’m thinking of throwing a fancy dinner party, but money’s a bit tight. Could you chip in ten bucks if you come?”

I don’t think it’s entitlement, I think it’s that wages are low, costs are high, and people are fucking broke.