I never really understood whisky, and then I tried a glass of The Macallan 18 a friend of mine ordered. I kept thinking, "$20 for a glass of whisky, I don't get it." -sip- "Oh."

@javrivnj: No. Say it ain't so.

My favorite kind of Brie.

@Tyrunn: "I think I'm blind"

@Barcard: I always thought he'd look more Semitic.

I've had nightmares like this.

One of my favorite Onion headlines:

@MrSpyder: Awesome! Thanks for the replies. Can't wait to see it.

Does anyone know if this was filmed in 3D or was it done in post-production? I'm very much looking forward to seeing this, but that 3D tag just tempered my excitement a little.

My pancreas just whimpered.

@DARSFOG: I knew I had seen something like this before.

Sharper Image sold a fret button guitar like the one featured in the video. I play an OK guitar, but I could not use that thing. No bending or slides, and playing the same note repeatedly just felt awkward.

"Meanwhile the positively charged protons, also known as ions..."

@travisco_nabisco: Same here.

@videobeagle: I didn't know the other half of the reference, which is the point, I guess. Learned something new, though.

@kitkatklub123: That's what The West Wing taught me.

In a related story, Foxconn opens a new plant in Burkina Faso, changes slogan to, "No, there are no children working here."

The sewage he probably inhaled is much worse than what he swallowed.

I camped once in the Badlands in South Dakota. At about 2 in the morning, I went out to do my business, looked up and gasped. The whole ribbon of the Milky Way was spread out above me. It was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. I have never seen it before or since.