Aaand now I’ve got the image of some dork sniffing his finger and pulling faces stuck in my head. Well done, you!

With a whole walk-in closet full of fancy designer riding boots!

I once used “It’s Complicated” just so Facebook wouldn’t constantly throw dating-service ads up at me. (I’m single and would rather not be told I should be looking, so that’s the complication.)

Who even IS this guy? Somebody more famous for being whiter and more fragile than a porcelain figurine than for his albums, that’s who.

His name really does rhyme with White Rice, No Spice. I had to laugh at that, and I’m probably even whiter than he is.

Privilege and the pointing-out thereof is an offence to Meritocracy™. “What do you mean I didn’t achieve all this by my superior self? I was born with better genes, how dare you mention a silver spoon?” Et cetera.

I think I might have to bawl pre-emptively.

Now THAT is truly groanworthy!

How about “What Have I Done to Deserve This?” by the Pet Shop Boys?

That poor stock photo model. What has she done to deserve this?

Saaaayyyyy, that’s pretty catchy! Can’t understand it for shit, but it’s catchy!

I hope she gets to go, and I hope she performs the shit out of this.

What her spluttering reminded me of.

I wondered about that dog too. I hope it wasn’t traumatized.

I bet their respective counsellors are always happy to see them waltz in without an appointment, too.

Heh...and here I disliked the stuff not because it scrubs too hard, but because the pieces are so few and far between that it feels like it’s not scrubbing at all. Sugar and olive oil works better for me.

I dunno...maybe digging for used condoms that they can sneak out and claim are theirs?

And the irony is, they’re the ones in the “Fuck Your Feelings” t-shirts...