"Documents also allege Patel took drugs ordered from Hong Kong to try to abort the pregnancy.

They'd probably try to treat it with rhino horn or tiger penis or some similar bullshit.

You know what else has health benefits? Chicken soup. Much safer to make.

Oh fuck. Now whenever I put on a black t-shirt and unremarkable jeans (i.e. most of the time) I have to feel like I'm playing right into the Gap's conspiracy to suck away everyone's individuality and personal identity. From now on I'm only leaving the house wearing old-timey bathing suits with the nipples cut out.

Some constructive criticism, thehunchbackofnotredwayne, since I see you are interested in pursuing a path in sexist trolling: you need to commit (I would suggest you fact-check, too, put that's probably beyond you — Maddie is a staff writer here, just FYI! That is a full-time position, and also a vagina is not…

In extremely rare cases, rich people have been known to pass their condition along to others, usually to spouses, adopted children, and their accountant's nephew. However, as you are "the help" you are safely ensconced in the "Lowest Possible Risk" pool.

It's okay, everyone! Deep breaths! Despite what Republicans have been trying to sell voters for years, Affluenza is not contagious. I repeat, you are not, at any point, in danger of catching Affluenza.

I wouldn't doubt that but you know, we're clearly stupid, it was the feral black animals that did it.
I would not be surprised if some of those white anarchists are off duty cops.

Its not a coincidence that the cops started cracking down tonight. They knew the autopsy report was going to drop and this is a great way to both distract from it and use the few protesters seeking confrontations as a way to build support for the police and their actions. The cops may be heavy handed and just plain…

Conservative lawmakers: the cockroaches of the Legislative Branch.

It means "Keep Your Eyes Open because they are trying to bamboozle you". But that's just too long.

Because the use of the vernacular was very appropriate in this context.

Came here to say the same simple thing. Kara has been TELLING it.

Thank you Kara.

I'm sure she called his mom "fat" at some point, too.

I...can not with this week as a young black woman I like to think of myself as optimistic but they are wearing me down. It upsets me because she isn't even talking to a black person and yet the n-word comes out of her mouth and all brown people look alike amirite? It flowed out too you can tell she uses it all the…

They have always fixated on whether white women are fucking minority men. Probably because they secretly would like to watch it.

I can't help but lol at her for calling him both an Atheist and a Muslim in the same breath.

A friend of mine got told on the Fourth of July that her husband wanted a divorce. He blamed her for everything - she was too in to her career, she wasn't getting pregnant fast enough, and a bunch of other douche canoe things in a list that smelled, shall we say, fishy, from the beginning.

Mine was probably the most cliche. My wife had accidentally sent me the email she meant for the other guy. For the first time I understood what it meant when people say, "that it felt like all the air was sucked out of the room." It felt exactly like that. What a horrible day that was. Two years later and that…