Hey, also Chaffetz used campaign funds for a $738.08 purchase last year at the Apple Store and his campaign pays his Verizon bill. Fuck that guy.

My family didn’t go to the movies a lot when I was growing up/a teenager. We wanted to till everything came to the video store (Video Library, Hollywood Video, my dad hated Blockbuster). So in 96 it was a big deal when we all went and saw the most talked about movie of the time “Twister.” We didn’t go see another…

I quit my soul-crushing job last week and I’m moving far, far away next month. Excited about a new beginning.

Wooo SNS! I was starting to get a little worried.

Deandre Jordan is more of a Maverick than John McCain.

Jesus Christ.

Well. This surely seems like it’ll make us safer! Definitely won’t prevent vulnerable people from going to the police to report crimes, or offer to be witnesses.

Soon we’ll all need Coyotes to lead us into Canada.

It’s called stealing.

You know, as shitty as this is, and as badly as they’re all going to screw everyone in this country, there’s a small part of me that’s going, “You know what? Fine. Have your cabinet. Have all of them. Enjoy. And when they all fuck up and screw everyone over and everyone is miserable, you’ll have NO ONE TO BLAME BUT…

Three thousand years of beautiful tradition, from Moses to Sandy Koufax… YOU’RE GODDAMN RIGHT I’M LIVIN’ IN THE FUCKIN’ PAST! 

Let me check the arithmetic:

I love how the states with the worst school systems all voted in favor of the worst cabinet pick.

I am a public school teacher. I am sitting at my desk, which is in a classroom in a public school full of minorities and SpEd students, and I am weeping. I have about 9 minutes left on my lunch break, and I don’t know that I can pull it together in time. I am crushed, absolutely gutted. I am afraid for my students, I…

I picked the worst day to quit smoking.

Stop using logic, you unpatriotic pinko gay-loving commie.

I read that Trump complained about Spicer’s suits. TRUMP, of all people, had opinions about another man’s suits. They are supposed to be adult men, why can’t they dress as such? Obama always had such gorgeous suits, Trump looks like a toddler in his older brother’s suit and Spicer looks like he won his suit at a…

Fun fact: the people who will be pissed off by this skit also think the girl Ghostbusters ruined their childhood. 

Sessions doesn’t have an ounce of Yates’s integrity. Not a goddamn chance in hell he would have done what she did yesterday.

I’m a Journeyman Ironworker out of Local 709 Savannah Ga. January 20 @ 1159 I quit my job building a DOE/NNSA fuel processing facility. I couldn’t fathom even technically working for Trump for 1 minute. I had a new job Monday @ 0600. I can afford to put principles in front of paychecks because I work Union. Organize…