Susanna Reid will one day stick a stiletto between Morgan’s ribs and serenely watch him bleed out.

This is what happens to a country that has been savaging its own infrastructure for nearly 40 years—ever since the miracle of Reaganomics was birthed—in order to justify tax cuts for corporations and the super-rich.

As a Canadian, obviously the Queen is my soverign. I have no problem with the monarchy, not only is it literally the only reason to visit England (excluding the rest of the UK), I’ve always seen it as “the living personification of the peaceful transfer of power.”

These actual human beings are living-symbols of the…

OK, new rule: any sitting government official who answers ‘I can’t recall’ to any question about critical meetings they had under 6 months ago they had should be removed from office, because they are either a liar or have mental issues that disqualify them.

It’s like they stole all the sexy cool shit from Chris Marlowe and attributed it to Shakespeare. Can Marlowe never get any fucking respect!?

I’m flight crew. LGA makes LAX look like one of those fancy airports in Dubai or Singapore. There are Somalis and Iraqis living in NYC 5 years and when the fly out of LGA for the first time have severe flashbacks of Mogadishu/ Baghdad; start mumbling to the effect, “Thought I’d left this behind...”

Isn’t it weird how “pro-life” leaders work so hard to increase the abortion rate? It’s almost like their commitment to pro-life policies only extends to passing laws regulating what women can do with their bodies, and not to actually reducing the number of abortions (let alone supporting non-fetal life).

As Stephen Colbert says, Trump sits on every chair as if it’s a toilet.

When I was in my 2o’s, I had a cute butt, perky tits and tiny waist. (But no silicone tits right under my chin.) Now I’m almost 67. After two pregnancies and a hard bout with breast cancer 18 year ago, I have a saggy ass, thick waist, poochy tummy and lopsided boobs. I still go to the gym to increase my muscle mass,…

Trump looks like a political cartoonist drew him, thought the caricature was too exaggerated, crumpled the sketch into a ball and threw it away. Later, under deadline, he said “Eh, fuck it, good enough” fished the sketch out of the wastebasket, smoothed it out with his hands and sent it in.

“As good fortune would have it, we had a bodyguard that summer,” she writes. They persuaded their bodyguard to buy lemonade, and then their driver, and then the maids, who “dug deep for their spare change.” The lesson, she says, is that the kids “made the best of a bad situation.”

Just so you know, that’s a massively stupid argument.

The H2-B program, i.e. Trump’s employees, appears to not be on the radar.

It’s Kansas so it could just as easily been a thriving metropolis 6 years ago before Sam Brownback was elected governor.

‘I am also on the Genghis Khan diet, which is recommended for young lotharios and involves eating sweet potato, sunflower seeds and horny goat weed.”

As someone who lives in Kokomo, Indiana, I’d just like to let everyone know that it’s a shit hole.

… MC Harry Shotta and DJ Discoboy…

Sometimes when I see ridiculous commercials, I try to imagine what that pitch meeting must have been like, and I feel like the phrase “protest is the new brunch” was uttered in this one.