I can guess the truthful responses.

Youabian Puma. You know, the one where the dude is trying to sue Jalopnik for stating how ugly it is. I mean, I wouldn’t buy it, but it sure looks like it would be normal if you were dropping LSD while watching Saturday morning action cartoons.

For such an otherwise beautiful car, this really is a shockingly shittily designed control cluster. Totally onboard with you on that one Tavarish.

Actually I’d say this customer is probably just one small chain of life events away from being a car dealer salesman himself. He sure has the raw talent for it.

Ferrari won’t even let you keep physical custody of your FXXK, why would they allow anyone to street-legal it?

Well, I mean, yeah, they're affected in that they'll presumably have to move to Canada if they want to be with him, but I dunno if that's really all that "affected" in the deeper sense that you're implying. Come on, it's Canada, not friggin' Syria.

Too much fucking colored piping everywhere. A little goes a long way, Toyota. Exercise some self-control for heaven's sakes.

Clearly trying to adopt the current Lexus school of grille design and failing miserably. The shape of this grille looks so tryhard and stupid compared to them.

YES

Yes. Or blue or brown or yellow or green or pink. Get your head out of your ass. IT'S NEVER OKAY TO LEAVE A CHILD ALONE IN A CAR.

Does anyone else realize that she left her baby in the freaking car?

There's a reason they're called 'stealerships'.

That was me getting yelled at by a GM at a SoCal Honda dealership (Pacific Honda) a few years ago. I went there and asked if they could match a price from the internet department at another dealership that was 20 miles further away from me. It was late on a weekday, and the floor staff that were there were already…

Everyone's playing by the same rules though, so what's the issue?

Everyone's playing by the same rules though, so what's the issue? And the guys who don't play by the rules, like South Coast Subaru, run the gigantic risk of being sued and losing their contract.

I've worked in sales, service, and food industry. My paycheck has always required me to provide the best service I can. I don't understand how it's so hard for people to be good to customers.

She scarred the crap out of a dead guy? Now that does sound like a great story.

and offset nipple pepperonis

I switched off at "liberal greener motherfuckers." What a raging mush-mouthed asshole.

/writes for Jalopnik