Hey, hey, hey, take it easy, chief. Nobody here wants any kind of problem, all right? Everything's cool. Just be cool.

Rapist beats Papists

Having to choose a favorite in this game is like choosing your favorite crime against humanity in history.

It's a rivalry game. It'll at least be 42-10.

I go 0-for-100 nigga real quick

Anyone notice the classic, "Oh, I gotta re-tie my shoelaces." move? This isn't Drake's first airball.

Probably misses his chair

They were both in the news the same day and I would not have thought to compare them if I hadn't read former Gov. Palin's remark about Bristol's "work ethic and heart for those less fortunate." I used only Bristol's own words and the facts from a police report.

Because Bristol wants us to know all about her dumb shit, and thinks she's a role model. This article was a fun way of problematizing Bristol's claim to authority by showing us what a real role model looks like.

Isn't it? The whole stark contrast is summed up right there. :)

But she IS a terrible person.

Well, it is.

But unlike Bristol, you didn't write and publish a memoir.

Sorry, no. "Give it a rest" means assholes win. Someone has to have guts and persistence.

Small market? Leave Columbus alone.

so you know kevin is an awesome guy and for you to be like this hiding behind your ralph avatar is pretty low TBH

I prefer Kevin's other personas, such as "gasping for air after dancing Kevin," "owns his own defibrillator Kevin," and "cries gently at home knowing his only purpose in life is to be a sideshow at a small market hockey game Kevin."

A) What the fuck. You can practically see him stamping his feet via text message.