The GOP believes in states rights, fetal rights, religious rights, and gun rights, but not human rights.

So you can spell a word with four letters but the girls got you so distracted you lost your apostrophe;)

Did you tilt the screen for a better angle?

Don’t worry, there are plenty of guys willing to drive her.

Not mine, damn it! Apparently Astronomese is not your first language.

The newest reality series, The Walking Braindead.

I’m positive I’m negative about the future of America now.

They wanted to be ready for the chicken.

Saturn, sure, but what about Uranus?

And how did he manage to misspell “naked girls”?

You should get that STI checked by a doctor, it seems to be damaging your brain.

What was so bad about Batchelor Party? Or did you mean Clueless in Seattle?

“...the main character drinks vodka by the liter.”

Evidently you put up with the problem much long than the other guy.

Strangely enough, that’s how I got kids.

It tastes like they left the rum and lime out.

Bourbon and Ginger? Can I get that with Mary Ann instead?

I think I see what you did there, but I kinda wish I didn’t.

I hope I’m not the first to bring this up, but proof your damn writing.

Couldn’t they all, though?