There’s no real room in the back of that thing. It looks good though. 

A SAAB. Always buy a SAAB.

COTD

Eh, few cases of beer might do it. 

No way, Harkonnen stillsuit chic.

Yeah, I remember 2016. I miss Obama. This new guy is smocking crack. 

Me too! All credit goes to Moshe Kasher. 

*Saltine-American is the preferred term. 

They’re lucky that shit didn’t go down at Wal-Mart.

Re: 1.) ~ Don’t I wish.

We have a responsibility to do. 

Click bait and switch. 

Go, UK!

Fried chicken, sweat, and piss, as backup singers to halitosis.

Guy’s a goddamn bad joke. A disgrace. 

No way, she’s very good looking. Beautiful eyes. 

His left nut probably dropped.

Don’t forget to say, “Merry Christmas” on the gift receipt.

Google “smegma”. That shit’s all over the handle. Sprinkle some on your fries. You are super tolerant and a pillar of the community. Way to go!

This is why I eat on the shitter.