Because you are either a Nasty Woman or a Bad Hombre (depending on your preference).

Agree to disagree. I think Kenny singing “I’m Alright” while a heart-broken woman chops off her long hair for a short ‘do that she suddenly has the moxie to pull off would be magical.

That was just a photo op to reach out to the two Mexicans in the country who AREN’T Bad Hombres.

We all get farty and bloated with a foamy Goodlatte.

This is a painful reminder that a (formerly) close friend unfriended me on Facebook and in life, in a very dramatic fashion, after I snarked on the trailer for the first one.

My iPhone also auto-corrects “chicken” to “children,” which means that I always order “Pad Thai with children as the protein.”

But if you had a yuuuuuge amount of money, wouldn’t you hire a bigly chef to make you fried chicken in your home? KFC is fine, but nothing beats homemade friend chicken.

It’s not a stereotype in this case. Trump, owner of a bigly fortune, with the most luxurious, best taste in everything is a fiend for KFC. Allegedly. There’s a lot of stories about him eating KFC alone in his tower or on the plane during the campaign. The joke was that he picked Pence because Mikey loves the Colonel’s…

Trump won’t understand this until someone explains it to him. KFC doesn’t serve fruit, so ALL fruit is strange to him.

He worked on it for years. YEARS!

Mean, but I laughed. 9/10, I deducted one point for making me feel bad after the fact.

I will only watch “Revenge Body” if it includes an ‘80's-style montage that includes working out, getting a hair cut, and throwing away/burning photos of the ex. Can Kenny Loggins write a new song?

HI, I’M MIKE LINDELL, INVENTOR!!!!!1!

What. I mean, WHAT?!?

To be fair though, tourists are nice and tender. You don’t want to serve only workaholics to black people. Too stringy and gamey from all the stress.

I love Korean skincare. My skin has never looked better, and the multi-step process is incredibly soothing to me in the morning and evening.

Turns out when Kara tried to give the eyeliner away to a friend (the color didn’t work on her), the eyeliner REAPPEARED IN HER MAKEUP CASE THE NEXT DAY.

And, generally speaking, a victim of theft probably isn’t going to be hassled and further traumatized by the very process of reporting the crime.

Absolutely - especially considering all the mythologies that are left unexplored....

We are kindred spirits, your son and I. My nightly port wine cheese ball will be in his honor.