I love Nintendo but...why do they do this shit? Archaic online features, shooting down fan theories—it all boils down to them being terrified of losing their family friendly image. And sure, they have cornered that market, it’s a good niche to have—but anyone who has gotten used to how progressive and easy Xbox Live…

Nintendo is powerful - but even them can’t stop Rule 34

In particular, fans became obsessed with the idea of Bowser wearing the Super Crown, turning him into a sexy princess in fetish gear.

Dear Nintendo,

So Nintendo rejects Bowsette but outs Luigi as trans?

COWARDS!

Yeah nah, not only is Bowsette everyone’s headcanon now, Peach is a toadstool too, and only looks like a princess because she has the same crown as Toadette.

Market research has also come a long way since then. It’s also important to note (though I have nothing in the way of actual evidence to support my point) that while a lot of games were bought for boys, a lot of their female siblings and such were probably also playing them. 

“in fetish gear.”

The problem is some people who used to do “nerdy stuff” thought they were being ignored b/c of their hobbies when in reality it’s b/c they were just scummy fuck heads that their “fellow nerds” only tolerated b/c they needed enough people to play the game. Now that everything is online the normal nerds can avoid them…

What’s up with that odd “large wife” comment tho

Oh, no, they technically only singled out “Luigette”, so while the ‘only Toadette can use this item’ bit sounds pretty solid, it’s actually just a misinterpretation of what would happen if anyone else where to put the crown on based on an archaic idea of gender roles and metamorphosis that may have applied in the…

“Oh no, I’ll have to stop drawing NSFW pictures of her!” said no artist ever.

So we’re just gonna skip over the implications behind the apology to Luigi? Does Luigi have a kinky side that doesn’t involve the dead?

I will take your gloomy announcement and present you with “Bowsette, crossed over with Warhammer 40K”:

Luigi can sport it...

I just said to myself “...But canon... Butt canon. Ha.” Then I wonder why I’m single and unemployed at 33.

...while in the same breath confirming that Luigi was REALLU INTO IT those times he “had to” dress up as Peach.

“The description inexplicably apologizes to Luigi, which is a whole new layer of trolling Bowsette fans.”