My preferred version:

wow! Verrrry nice!

ALL THE STARS!!!

You know serious shit’s going on when you need to hide in the bushes because you don’t want to answer questions.

Here’s John Oliver’s segment with the audiobook excerpt:

He isn’t secretly John Ringo is he?

“I am very good at cumming fast and in the presence of strangers.”

Yeah, those guys who pretended to be trans for “teh lols” are only making it harder for trans people to be accepted by the community.

Please, everyone who thinks he’s acting like a sulky, entitled douchebag, just take two minutes and watch the damn clip (which, for some reason, links instead to Apple.com in the post)

+1 Dr. Hfuhruhurr

It’s because Barron isn’t his kid.

Hahahhahahahahahahahaha FUCK YOU ALEX JONES

Its Murdaaaaaaaaaa

Wow - spot on! I was a freshman in 1997/98 and we had the same 3 DVDs. There was also a Nintendo 64 and a copy of Goldeneye. Good times!

The part where Marge is so stressed that she’s started popping pills four years worth of pills in less than 100 days really did make me sad.

NOOT NOOT MOTHERFUCKER

I <3 Pingu 4 evva

From TNR:

I did not expect a Fifth Element reference.