Yeah, it's not the atmosphere, it's the speed you hit the atmosphere.

mysterious energy ribbon = the loving arms of Jæsus

There must be some serious cultural disparity going on here. It's silly enough to be completely outside the bounds of Western jurisprudence.

Hopefully April Fool's has taken a page from Christmas and is beginning to "start earlier and earlier" every year.

"Perhaps if you'd drop your lawsuit and permit our use of the word 'Appstore', we'd release a Cloud Player for iOS..."

Does this mean the iPhone 5 will have an atomic battery?

There isn't a problem with it, but it does demonstrate that the people who pay a higher price at a specialized retailer are quite stupid.

It goes beyond critique to pretend, on a supposedly factual television show, that the product broke while it was being tested, when in fact it was an intention to "demonstrate" what would happen if it broke.

I do want to cut the guy a little slack because he's 79, and judging from his heavy use of crutch phrases ("as such" / "so to speak" / "as I recall", sometimes more than once in the same or in two consecutive sentences) may not be in the greatest shape, mentally. He must have an incredibly patient editor...

Note to prospective bullies: Don't pick on kids who are twice as big as you.

Does anybody remember that this exact same thing happened a little over a year ago?

Does anybody remember that this exact same thing happened a little over a year ago?

I don't know. This guy's approach to the English language reminds me worryingly of Sarah Palin being interviewed by Katie Couric. That and the fact that they have absolutely no clue what they want the movie to be about, except that there will be "ideas and possibilities," replicants, plus "characters and whatnot."…

Ohh, she meant a dual-core processor. This reminds me of how every time I visit my grandmother I have to show her how to copy and paste.

Ouch.

It's not really that fishy that the bone could be hers. I saw a television documentary that made a fairly plausible case that she may have landed on a sandbar at low tide because she was lost and out of fuel. Then she and her navigator would have attempted to survive on the island, but lacked the resources to do so.…

The situation where rooms are more or less equal may be standard to you, but it isn't to people who may live in an area that has a lot of older buildings that have been renovated a bunch of times and possibly converted into multi-occupant dwellings. This is especially common in denser, older cities where buildings…

I think you mean most awesome. Thanks for going to the trouble of stringing so many honey flashes together in a row.

Um, was it really worth hiring the plane? Did you discover his cellar of human livers ready for transplant?

@Marmalade Teardrops: The names have been reported in numerous other places, and have become part of the story as it's commonly understood. This is particularly true of the political activities and published writings of one of the alleged victims, who has advocated seeking revenge against former partners simply for…