Wow. The desperation. Just the fact that the author got paid for writing this article makes it professional. That's what the word means, after all.

Every time SNL airs, the president-elect throws a shitfit in public. I'd say they have suddenly regained relevance. Wonder if they'll actually do anything useful with it.

That's a calm and rational statement of fact. You might be projecting a bit here.

The government of the Empire in Star Wars is almost entirely making the military insanely huge so they can rule by force. I mean, they actually disband the bureaucratic apparatus of government in the original Star Wars so that the military governors can assume direct control. The Empire is a military dictatorship,…

The Empire is a fascist dictatorship run by an evil space wizard who kills people he doesn't like by shooting lightning from his fingers.

Yeah, and I'm running out of places to hide the bodies. It's not working.

The Democrats showed up…just in the wrong states. Because voting in certain states is more important than voting for others. That's how you can get 2.5 million fewer votes and still win.

He tried to. Watto refused. Then you're back to "Well, he could kill Watto with his laser sword…"

Casting agencies. It's pretty hard to get aliens to show up to casting calls.

Hating big centralized government is just something they say. What they mean is that they hate social welfare programs. Whenever they're in power they always drastically increase the size of the government by creating brand new security and surveillance programs.

And he's currently on-tour. He's got a full slate!

So…what? Qui-Gonn should have started a war of liberation on Tattooine or something? He's a legally-appointed deputy of the Senate…and Tattooine isn't part of the Republic. He had no authority there, and starting a revolution wasn't part of his current mandate. The Jedi answer to the Senate, and if the Senate…

Darth Vader is a whiny white guy in a black suit.

The irony is that they got worse with each revision. The early drafts of Phantom Menace, for instance, are an intensely better movie.

Had Lucas actually explored that idea…like having the Jedi utterly beholden to the elected Senate, and thus the elected Chancellor, who ordered them to lead the army despite the Jedi objecting that they were peacekeepers and not soldiers…

The internet lets them do the same thing while out of easy ass-whupping range. That's essentially the explanation for any and all asshatery seen online.

The important thing is that you've found a way to feel superior to them both.

"Friendly" has always been half-ironic, since his primary job is beating people with his fists.

An idiot will drag you down to his own level which provokes an attack of opportunity. You just have to spec properly.

He does frequently wear rouge.