That’s fucked up.

But didn’t just about all of us do that?

Or just click on the Youtube icon on the bottom right of the screen and watch directly from the source without ads. Hella lot quicker than sitting through these ads which seem to be getting longer and longer.

You’re trolling at the wrong bar. You’re obviously not a regular.

I could skip the coffee and mint and just plow though donut holes and shots of tequila all night.

I’ve seen mint syrup on offer at tons of coffee joints. It’s the tequila and coffee that gives me pause.

Shake the ever-loving-god-damn-sweet-fucking-hell out of it for 10-12 seconds.

I really love the little dancing with the stars cocktail shaker.

I will definitely have to check every pocket to find anything every time. After my first outing nothing will ever end up in the right pocket again.

This is the perfect argument for eloping.

How did I ever manage to feed myself all these years without this?

WTF

Scrotum. Definitely.

Murder her, then malign her. Fuck them. Just fuck them.

It was tacky anyway.

Me!

I think I NEED The Wine Diet Cookbook.

Lord how I can’t stand these women.

If your cat has kittens, can you get one in Mother Kitty Milk beads?

Yeah. I had that problem a lot in high school and college, only with missed classes and assignments.