Gay Nazis! Why did it have to be gay Nazis?

Come on murder/suicide, come on murder/suicide… dammit!

Eh, it's no 'football in the groin'

The sauce contains potassium benzoate.
That's good!
He's built up an immunity.
That's bad.
He could always choke to death.
That's good!
Mike Pence would then be president.
…
That's bad.

This story is a plant.
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

Steve needs time in the morning to adequately attach his human skin. He is simply sick of having to devour each and every person who happens upon his dressing room while he is in his larval state. Also he's trying to cut down on carbs.

I was sick of the stupid mythos of Alien 3 on and I wanted a return to 'horror as pregnancy metaphor' so I gave Prometheus a lot of credit for that 'abortion' scene where the equipment was not calibrated for female physiology, because of course it wasn't.

So… like a MLP lego reboot? Worth a shot.

I eagerly look forward to science things being named after Marvel superheros and twitter memes in 30 years.

Damn that was a lot of pancakes.

Oh yeah, ha, I vaguely remember this happening, what, two constitutional crises ago? These last few weeks are kind of a blur.

Last Man Standing will be replaced by repeats of the Geico Caveman show.

Have no fears, we've got stories for years, like
Sofía Vergara becomes a robot,
Maybe Nolan Gould gets a cell phone, has Cameron Tucker ever owned a bear?
Or, how 'bout a crazy wedding?
Where something happens and doo doo doo doo doo…

Well, this shouldn't diminish the role the charter schools can play in providing competition for public schools to keep up their standards if we assume equal resou- hahaha I'm just kidding fuck these Republican assholes.

Between the studios doing Pacific Rim 2 without Guillermo Del Toro and now the studios doing Hellboy without Guillermo Del Toro I'm starting to think that the message here is 'fuck Guillermo Del Toro.'

Can you imagine if we were reduced to asking Gorbachev what an aggressively demented, senile, violently raging, law-breaking Reagan was thinking?

This is going to be substantially less funny in six months or so when the stakes are exponentially higher so enjoy it now while you can, folks.

The 'X gon' give it to ya' mix of Spencer being punched in the face over and over and over has gotten me through some hard times.

The whiplash between 'Comey cost the Dems the election' and 'Trump firing Comey is really really bad for the country' is incredibly difficult to process, but I hope people do it quickly.

God I bet Nixon would be jealous that Trump can just tweet the things Nixon had to say secretly in his private recordings.