Stick to sports.

This probably would have been more successful if it were more of a basic work truck with a Mercedes badge a la thier Sprinter van. But hindsight and all that.

Inside sources say this will be the new company logo:

That’s where he keeps his secret stash of rooks.

Thank you for saying this! There’s a pretty high-volume Kia dealer in my town so I’ve seen a ton of these rolling around already, and was really confused as to why some were amber and some where white.

I went to a twitter feud the other night, and a hockey app broke out.

Some of you are here to make a beautiful pâté but we’re making sausage most of the time.

I had a pressure cooker lid crack open on me and spray hot steam on my left hand (luckily I’m right handed). Literally the most painful thing I’ve experienced in my entire life.  Do not fuck with pressurized steam, people.  That shit is deadly.  Burns are no joke!

The unikidney

More like Subearu... right?

God help us if bears start driving. They can’t keep it between the yellow lines

Suicide. Is there a shortcut this guy won’t take?

That’s not a bug, that’s a feature. It’s just an easter egg reference to this:

Aw come on.. House fires only happen to unfunny people.

Man, these guys really won’t defend anything.

Yes! In 1975, they broadcast, obviously for free,THREE of Muhammad Ali’s heavyweight championship fights, TWO Evel Knievel jumps, and John Walker’s WR mile run, among many other cool things.

Well since he effectively got nothing and just wasted everyone’s time, he could’ve just stayed in his yard with his ball in the first place and waved at Mexico

Rob Thomas, A/K/A Sinbad’s bitch.

Sephiroth was a sled!

My dad would buy us the really, really, really large bag of popcorn from the supermarket. That was our food for the roadtrip. We just ate popcorn for the whole ride. And it dehydrated you so that you didn’t have to pee. If we were lucky, we stopped once every 2 hours.