If I give you a pat on the head and a warm oatmeal cookie will you be calm enough to do something more productive?

Do they though?

I would judge you, but I watched "Getting Levi's Johnson".

Ah yes, back when we thought she tanked McCain because she was dangerously stupid. Now we know it was because she had a vagina.

I'm sorry, I only followed the real life election. Who is Brianna Wu and what role did she play in the bizarro election that occurred inside of your delusion?

It'd be much funnier to see a bunch of racists with cartoon frogs tattooed on their faces instead of swastikas.

He later tweeted a downgrade of "hit piece against my brand" to "on the negative side". Of course you read the article and it's just an accurate description of what happened and who he is, showing that, like the president, he's internalized that he is a "brand" and any piece that doesn't offer unadulterated praise is…

I'm a marionette that's been animated by a team of Leprechauns, does that count?

But…he was actually on the cover of a real issue of Time just recently for "Person of the Year". I guess that real issue doesn't have any effusive praise, but "President of the Divided States of the America" can be interpreted however you want (I'm the best at dividing, etc. etc.) not to mention I'm sure he takes…

They're the wurst.

I re-watched both hanging dong and lesbian sex scenes. Because I'm progressive, not desperately lonely and sexually confused. Can it be multiple things?

Only if you want to leave 'em hanging.

If you're giving up these thought exercises for free, I don't know why I even see my therapist. Well… minus the woman part, I'm not seeing Pence's therapist.

It's weird they would hire a 27-year old to play a young version of a character, and then give him a haircut (wig?) that makes him look older than the original character.

Gotta love an article that starts with "Our source for this article has obviously false information, but some of it seems plausible so we're gonna go ahead and present it as fact."

Just wait until his entire presence in "The Invisible Man" is marked by a floating scarf and a rotating assortment of hats.

Well, if the guy had purposefully driven his car into a school, maybe, and that's a better comparative than the one you're trying to make.

That's not a very nice thing to assume, George RR Martin is an intelligent respected author. Surely he has it memorized by now.

He likes everything from white twinks to white twinks who hit the gym.

Ryan Murphy sure is creating quite the cabal of gay and (probably) gay-for-pay actors. I wonder what the auditioning process is like.