I teach sixth graders. They write circles around Trump.

It’s so luxurious, you wouldn’t believe what people are saying about this stocking cap, I sent the best people to find my cap, they tell me this is the longest one anywhere, anywhere in the world you can’t find a better one than this, I was in China and other Asia and I see the stocking caps they have there, everyone…

the longest stocking cap

I love this because I imagine that he was just tossing and turning in bed seething about this and then finally leaped up, cast aside his absurdly long stocking cap, and tweeted this out before collapsing back into bed.

my worst Miss U.

And the Super Bowl too, I guess.

Prince, of course. Also gives me a reason to post the hall of fame performance.

You are my hero, sir.

I am hoping to be wrong, but are terrorists running his twitter?

God, it’s like if Trump knew enough about cyber to write a blog.

Curt hasn’t been this invested in a trainwreck since 38 Studios.

Another good Getty photo:

My wife and I had a dog with a fucked-up thyroid. He was blind, too, and had been dumped by his previous owners. He was found living in a strip mall parking lot. Even though his diet consisted almost entirely of food scraps and the feces of other animals, he still had ballooned to well over 30 pounds when he was…

“We think you’re shittier than Florida” is about the strongest burn I’ve ever heard of.

Despite what people might say, this is not really black and white. Technically, that video is what is called “grayscale.”

I fully support Kaepernick and the protests (and dialogue) he’s sparked nationwide. But when you hear him talk, he sounds like someone who got recently woke by some hotep tweets.

As a Yankees fan that lives in Boston, I have to say this is a fun Red Sox team to watch.

I say this with no jest: it’s a good thing that the smart people are in charge, and the dumb people are just noise here

Y’know, I’ve been saying it for years: I agree that Rosa Parks had a valid point to make, but making white people uncomfortable wasn’t the right way to do it.