I don't know why all of you weirdos are so upset about this: I'm feeling empowered as fuck right now.

i love when jlo comes out in something like this. just to casually remind everyone that she's still better than them.

I do not see it as implied ownership as well?

He's totally like "Hey did anyone else see how adorable my baby is or was I the only one?"

I think you meant Klassy. That's a whole different ballgame, the exact opposite of classy.

When you treat your kid as an extension of your brand your baby isn't black or white, it's GREEN.

With the 10th bullet, he gets a bonus swag bag.

Truth. Attacking a car with an umbrella = mentally ill; creating a Hello Kitty bathroom = batshit crazy and I loves it.

The irony of getting angry at people for calling someone "batshit crazy" and then turning around and using the abelist slur "lame." lol

Somewhere, Debbie Matenopoulos just looked up from the lemon water she was sipping and gasped, "Someone just mentioned me on the Internet!!!" ;)

Mentally ill is not the same as someone who likes to make her whole house a glittery butterfly palace and to show up on TRL in a bikini.

I'm trying my best! It's an uphill battle against "this isn't an English class!" and "whatevar u no wut I mene!"

a Chris Brown/Justin Bieber rap feud. Not the rivalry we want but the one we deserve. #westcoastforlife #gangsignhere

Here a thing, a man so stupid he makes the news for it. What should that man do?

Excuse you, it's "here a thing".

Suge Knight would get shot at the Kids Choice Awards.

His posts sound like far too many people on my Facebook feed who share posts like this with the hash tag #realtalk

Nick Cannon is an ass and an opportunist. If you care about someone's emotional well-being, blabbing about it to the press seems an odd way to show your concern/be helpful. I hope that pre-nup was iron-clad, Mariah.

Get back to me when there's a trailer for Broad City.

You are a horrible writer.