First Kyle transfers. Then Kyler is considering transferring. If Kylest goes, it’ll be really bad.

After watching this GIF, it’s easy to conclude that Rich Old Guy Performatively Dressed In Casual Wear is your typical square who went and crapped all over what could have been a cool moment with his supreme awkwardness.

The celebration? Meh.
What IS ridiculous is grown men pearl clutching about a touchdown celebration using the cliches actual athletes and coaches in interviews.

You’re not being interviewed.
No one cares about your opinion (thus the gray font).
They play a game. (which you obviously take too seriously.)

“Or how, for whatever reason, some of the residents are carrying around ammo for handguns.” To be fair, this is essentially a world modeled off a extreme Red Scare, no gun control (GCA68) society that has been experiencing serious social disruptions due to resource shortages. It seems plausible that they’d be packing.

Roses are Red

I’m no fan of the Lakers, but that is a good response...

Only 1 in 14 people could get through..

Hello no haters please and thank you

This kind of sensationalist nonsense isn’t why I come to Deadspin.

“Remember the Titans?”

You can’t really be this dumb, right? Just a big Johnny Football fan with incredible blinders on? Please?

Tom, maybe you didn’t watch the video, but the Ravens were offsides. It’s a free play, and the results count only if the Rams want them to — the Rams accepted the penalty, so nothing that happened the last play actually happened. No play, no concussion. Case closed.

I think the Colts would probably be the best fit for Peyton, given the bevy of pain killers they can offer him.

“Meesa will avenge you, Annie!”

Guys. Dabbing is the process of smoking marijuana concentrates. It gets you totally baked.

Josh Gordon must be pissed, he got suspended for an entire YEAR for dabbing.

Until last weekend I thought dabbing was what I do every day after class as I'm listening to the Grateful Dead.

Dabbing:

*Looks down at rig*

Guess I’m doing wrong.