Are we sure this isn’t just a guy who kinda looks like Oakley but spells his name Oakey and wears cheaper suits?

That’s what you get for naming your team after a guy with HIV.

Arena media managers for the next few Cavs road games are hurriedly getting approval to play Air Supply.

You underestimate the 100% pure organic farm to table dickishness of James Dolan.

By my count there are at least 26 golf balls in that picture not including the one on the tee. Either they’re at a driving range or he is taking more Mulligans than Ellis Island.

Oh I don’t know about that. Rumor has it LBJ was quite large...if you know what I mean.

Old enough to know better than to answer that question on the Internet.

As a person who doesn’t use drugs, can one of you stoners chime in and let us know if this is better to watch while on drugs? I’m not getting what the director is going for with these camera angles.

Skajillion isn’t even a real number. FAKE NEWS!

I mean, we don’t know who his dad is, and Jesus didn’t have a dad in the classic sense, so...

Of all the companies headquartered in New York City, this is the best they could do?

His IQ probably isn’t even high enough to spell “IQ”.

I know some guys who specialize in getting the Melo out of New York City:

He had knee and thumb injuries last year but he has been adamant that it wasn’t the reason he had a down year. Not sure I agree. I think it affected his speed in the outfield (knee) and his approach at the plate (thumb).

It was really tough to see him have such a down year. He is a beloved player in Pittsburgh and I am sure the fans are glad he is going to still be with the team, while at the same time hoping last year was an exception and that he bounces back in a big way this year.

Those kids are hungry for victory! And also a cheeseburger. And love and affection. And their own room.

Next you’re going to tell me her real name isn’t even Lady Gaga. THIS IS HORSESHIT.

How do you pronounce her name?

Which one? There are so many.

True Kobe Buffalomeat is only available in Japan. It would be more accurate to refer to him as “Kobe style” Buffalomeat.