The Very Secret Diaries of the Fellowship of the Ring very nearly broke me:

It’s not even a matter of police unions not bothering to demand higher standards. A lot of the time they’re actively fighting against higher standards. Hell, the Milwaukee PD named the cop who handed one of Jeffrey Dahmer’s victims back to him their Officer of the Year that year. It’s a particularly egregious example,…

Spoken like someone who refuses to understand that not everyone has reason to believe that calling the police is likely to be helpful. What you see as ingratitude is simply an acknowledgement of reality for some people.

Well-played. Not that Primus is ever NOT well-played, but especially so here.

There’s definitely a learning curve. It took me a couple of months to perfect the insertion. Also, some brands work better than others for certain people (the disposable Softcups were a miserable failure for me). However, I can’t imagine going back to tampons again. Everything is so much cleaner now.

You may find those figures unbelievable. I, on the other hand, started hearing my friends describe being sexually assaulted when I was NINE, and I’ve been hearing it ever since. I have zero problem believing it’s happened to a quarter of women. Based on what I’ve heard from my male friends, I think you’d have a hard…

Y0u think the masses of people who gave money to an anti-gay pizza parlor won’t trip the fuck over themselves to throw money at the Duggars if the show is cancelled? This family will never have to worry about doing without.

North Carolina age of consent is 16, so legally he was in the clear.

This is true. Way more epic than my marriage. Let me tell you, though, binge-watching without Netflix kinda sucks when you feel like ass and have to change the tape every two hours, especially when you're watching 5 seasons of a show.

Give it a month or two.

My ex-husband has a son with an ex-girlfriend in another state, so he got his son for weekends and holidays. We got married a week before his summer visitation ended, so his son could be our ring-bearer. In the week between our wedding and his son going home/the beginning of our honeymoon, I came down with bronchitis…

Sounds like my grandfather. My grandmother married him after he raped her and she got pregnant. The pattern continued throughout their marriage, resulting in my double-digit number of aunts and uncles.

1. Last Christmas I broke my foot by standing up from the sofa while my foot was asleep. Apparently when you stand up it's supposed to be the BOTTOM of your foot touching the ground.

This seems like a whole lot of "seeing what you want to see", which in this case is "a whole mess o' persecution at the hands of evil feminists." The article I read was pretty firmly against the view of men being perpetually in need of a place to stick their penis. But whatever you gotta do to keep that battle of the…

I was prepared to be disappointed, since I've always felt that it should be adapted as miniseries a la Ken Burns. But this travesty... if I ever meet Brad Pitt, Angelina's not getting any for a couple of days, because I'm going to kick him so hard in the balls they'll need a map and a compass to to make their way…