I’m sorry — a bed with jizz all over it? Is this a common thing in tanning beds?

I just had an epiphany! Do you think his horrible orange color might be due to all that artificially colored ketchup he’s been eating all these years? Cuz you just know he eats loads of the cheap stuff.

It seems like people kinda like the song, but I think it’s terrible. Like it’s so bad. It’s not even the actual beat or melody, but the lyrics are just so basic. A 12 year old could have wrote it.

I am probably alone here but this whole “feud” makes me like Perry less and less. She comes off as really petty to me. She seems to be the one intent on keeping it alive.

Believe me, there were some ASSHOLES saying shit to me and about me when I posted previous items. But it’s all good because the important thing is that it is happening.

My understanding is that it is worse than anything we can even think. And it’s a monster with many tentacles.

If anyone else is feeling dread about Mother’s Day for any reason, I feel you. I grew up with a psychologically abusive mother and enabling family members. Over the past few years I’ve been trying to change the situation, and have greatly reduced the time I spend with them, but tomorrow is brunch at one of my…

Why Melania won’t fuck him into a heart attack and save us, also leaving her free to play the Merry Widow, I do not know. She’d be such a freaking hero to us all.

That account has been shown to be bogus. We can’t cite false information. We do need to continue pressure for continuing investigations based on the insanity that has already taken place...not Twitter accounts.

Is Susan Sarandon even just tiniest bit of self aware? She reminds me of my grandmother who had a mood disorder. Any time she disagreed with you, you were an idiot and misinformed and she was clearly right. And is she trying to telling call Deborah a punk for not saying shit to her face? If she was so passionate about…

I’m fucking sick of the “play nice, go high” rhetoric. Playing nice is for reasonable people who can have reasonable discussion on differences in policies and ideas. That’s not what we’re dealing with here.

like, this was my rent, which I just spent on this thing that’s not happening.

Oh without this celeb trend I’d still be walking this line. I do it every year. My hair is super curly so it’s a fucking righteous pain in the ass pretty much no matter the length, but those fucking strands on the back of the neck. Maaaaaaan they are the worst. Because of the aforementioned curls, shampooing everyday…

AnnieAnn, you poetic and noble land-mermaid. This is so fucking true it hurts. Thank you for this public service.

For the last year or so I’m like fuckkkkk hurry up and announce the divorce already! But these things take time I suppose.

from Kim to Kylie: “You have psoriasis! Welcome to the club!” They hug.

Caitlyn, maybe it’s your behaviour. Maybe it’s YOU

I am 99% certain he is some kind of Christy/Republican something or other who just wants people to stop being divisive by, you know, demanding rights and protections and shit.

You do not get to feel sorry for yourself for your screwed up life when you caused said screw up in the first place and are still actively screwing it up!

He has an hereditary title, so it dies with him if there’s no son to accede to it.