She got this game for her birthday:

Resting bitch face is real.

In that she is blonde?

Oh, I know. We base it on a reward system, whereas yours is a punishment system.

That IS how people behave around rape.

Once you have one you're already screwed, so it's less effort to do two or more. It's not really multiplicative like you think.

As a friend, if you feel so inclined, the best thing you can offer her is to take the kid out of the house for an hour while she takes a bath. If a single one of my friends had done that for me then it would have made my world. However, the fact that you are just there for her probably means a lot. Support is the…

YOU (screaming) POTATO (thing) WITH EYES!

It's also a shame that people feel the need to try and convince other people, who might actually like kids, that having kids is irrational and miserable just because they've been judged about not having kids and want to throw back some shit. JUST DO YOU, EVERYONE.

I think it depends very much on the children in question.

Hee. Okay, I don't *hate* Jonathan Franzen. What I hate is the way the New York Times transforms itself into his personal PR machine when he has a book out, to the exclusion of the books people are actually reading, so he's sort of a symbol for a whole binary hierarchical....oh, fuck it, I hate that smug motherfucker,…

The suppressed joy in the groom-to-be's eyes is borderline manic. That's what I would look like too, if I were ever in a picture next to Bill Murray.

I can honestly relate to this and if you ever write an autobiography you should call it This is Autism: I took the penny personally.

He's mine.

I know right? Homegirl jumped on that grenade like a champ.

I'm so glad there are folks out there who like this shit. It saves the rest of us from having to date those dudes.

I hope they expand the early bird/night owl research to find out why some people are incapable of taking naps no matter how tired they are. Unless I am extremely sick, I can't and haven't napped since before I started pre-school. I remember kindergarten when they would roll out the nap mats for all the kids to lie…

as the mother of a wiley and energetic toddler, I have a whole other annoying association with "bedtime procrastination"

Liar, you know it's two bottles.

I wish. I struggle to stay up past 11. Even on weekends. If I don't get my eight hours, I am not a happy camper.