The wonderful Cameron Esposito had a number of great tweets today about Indiana's bullshit "religious freedom" law

Even aside from an increased risk of rape, it just floors me that anyone would think it would be a good idea to house 16-year-olds - almost all of whom will be reintegrating into society at some point - with much older people who may have far more extensive criminal histories.

stopping a small child from implanting

If Carol dies, I won't watch the show anymore at all. She's the only person who's fate I care about, now.

I'm a morning person. And an extrovert. I'm married to a non-morning introvert who never gets enough sleep (he's halfway through a surgical residency; he will literally never get enough sleep ever again until he dies). I have learned to just ignore him for his first hour of awake time. I make no noise that isn't…

"No, ma'am, actually the sun is going to remain in its place as it has for millions of years. The Earth, however, will continue spinning and proceeding on its orbit as planned; would you like me to ask a manager to pull the emergency brake?"

Mine hates that I am not a morning person. He's constantly trying to game my system, and offering to bring me coffee first thing, or get an electric blanket so I wake up warm, or start playing music to wake me up, or...

Me: This is the answer, blah, blah.

Yeah but my house has one major advantage over Kylie Jenner's: no Kardashians or Jenners live in my house.

About the only time I see this phenomenon being discussed in popular culture-albeit obliquely— is in horror movies, one of the biggest arbiters of our fears in modern times.

This was upsetting and kind of an eye opener. We are buying a new house soon and I have given my husband several ideas for renovations that would really suit our personalities. Every time without fail he tells me it won't work because of xyz. Only after I go online and find some guy that has a DIY step by step (that…

My first husband wasn't very bright. It's never a good idea to cheat on a wife that works for a government agency known for its expertise in spying. Third generation in the same line of work to boot.

Wow. He's the worst, but your former mother-in-law can go fuck herself with a cactus too.

My (now ex) fiancé and I had a somewhat long-distance relationship. I worked an a city 3 hours from the small town we lived in, so I would stay with friends or my parents while I worked my 4 days on, and go home on my days off. Things were never "good" when I was at home, but anyone can tolerate each other for 4-5…

College, I was dating a douche y Navy ROTC dude who lived in his frat house. He bailed on a date night with me because he was "sick," so being a dutiful girlfriend, I took some chicken noodle soup over to the frat house. Walk in, walk up to his room, and there he is, banging some rando chick. I hurled the soup at…

"It is the position of the American Dietetic Association that appropriately planned vegetarian diets, including total vegetarian or vegan diets, are healthful, nutritionally adequate, and may provide health benefits in the prevention and treatment of certain diseases. Well-planned vegetarian diets are appropriate for…

This dress is really cute and the stripes are smartly placed.

There has never and will never be a moment in my life where KITTEN or PUPPY or CUPCAKE is not the answer. The day those are not the answer is the day I have stopped thinking farts were funny. That is the day I have died completely inside and would be euthanized for my own sake.