Yeah, I would strongly encourage everyone to avoid the bowl cut at all costs. Unless the look you're going for is "Albino Penis in Pilgrim Costume."

Oh, yes. It sounds exactly like that.

Stay tuned for my Thought Catalog Piece "What it's like to be a white woman dating white men".

How did I get together with my SOs?

Hi, I came here to say I love your screen name.

Yep, totally a sewing thing. If you gaze upon his crotch, you'll see a diamond piece of fabric situation upon there. That's a gusset. It is usually cut on the bias (diagonal to the grain of the fabric) which in layman's terms means it has additional give then the rest of garment (which is cut with the grain). They…

Emma wins. Fatality.

My name is Kenny... and I'm a cockoholic. I haven't had a man in three days.

I'm sorry, this arrangement can't work. She requires her own, 500 thread count feather pillow. You'll have to find someone else to make your twisted, swinger, ménage a trois fantasy come true, you sex-pervert!

and this is what the rest of the courtroom was wearing.

EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

I think that the debate regarding school dress codes needs to focus on the "why" more than the "what." When you start with the assumption that dress codes are necessary, you wind up getting tangled up arguing the "common sense" of hair color and "strap width." We need less institutional shaming of the human body…

Oh my goodness, you are a magician.

All fixed! Did my best to match the level of quality.

I don't understand why if you're a certain size, designers think your taste level goes down and you have less money to spend.

Seriously, thank you for doing the emotionally demanding work that I'm sure this was. This is all terrifying, but important to know about.

I ... have a theory. It hasn't quite gelled yet, so I'm reluctant to put it out there.

No ma'am. Loganberry for LIFE.