“Everything else is masturbation”

“you are going to be one of the reasons he gets a second term...” 

“I tip because I CAN.”

In that kind of situation I tip if the person behind the counter seems like the kind of person whose life I would like to subsidize to the tune of $1.

You know, I just got cable TV after living without it for 25 years, and I was surprised to see that Guy Fieri’s show is actually tolerable about half of the time.

Yeah, while the constant pop-culture references are certainly cheap nostalgia the notion of this massive, immersive virtual world where people are engaging in a quest with real-life consequences was kind of compelling.

This was really the most eerie lingering effect of Hurricane Sandy in NYC. No gas anywhere for about a week. When a station did get filled the line would be hours long and the cops would be there to prevent fights.

As a matter of fact they were shocked to learn about the rule change declaring Jim Halpert to be the worst. But in John Kranzinski’s defense, he had no idea the cameras were still rolling. He was pretty handsome then but what he looks like now is incredible.

Seriously, it will cause you to question the very nature of self-identity and truth. Things that once brought you joy will now only cause sadness, and the stress of this experience will probably cause you to gain about 15 pounds. Gaze upon Reason No. 17, ye mighty, and despair.

Wait, you forgot to read Reason No. 17. It will blow your mind!

Yeeah, boyyy!

“six months on the job training “

Women be intuitively drawn towards violent distopia when the normal checks of civilization are absent, amirite?

Yeah, this is incredible. In the midst of a national crisis Trump feels the need to take a swipe at Obama, for literally no reason. The man is mentally ill.

“Someone Great” is a pretty obvious choice for best song.

It is a bit weird now that AVC is integrated into the gawkerverse. I get that Univision wants to stick it to the man, that the AVC readership clicks and comments on these stories a lot, and that really this is the group that I’d most like to discuss all of this with, but...this weird duplication really doesn’t seem…

Remember when it seemed like she was the stupidest and most infuriating major-party political candidate we’d ever see?

It seems like they are not actually friends, right. First there is the absurdly bossy tone of the email, then there is the fact that she did indeed choose to leak it.

Man, this kind of toady is the worst. Lacks backbone but feels superior to anybody who isn’t a sellout, feels entitled to boss this person around (say exactly this, don’t call me to discuss it, if you don’t your career is over). The ultimate “insider” who got there by scratching the right backs.

Last night I made a sweeping generalization about your mom’s fan base.