Shaturn’sh moon Ensheladush can exshplain everyshing. It’sh not drunk, only had one, maybe two drinksh, had a hard day at the offish, gonna lie down on the couch now, have a li’l nap. Gonna feel better shoon.

If you take “Alien: Covenant” and the original “Alien” together, you get some strong hints about where the next film(s) might go.

From “Prometheus”, we know that the ‘Space Jockey’ of the original “Alien” is an Engineer. The ‘Jockey’ fell victim to a chestburster, and is carrying a cargo of facehugger-filled eggs. But…

This is great stuff. I’ve printed out the 6-point checklist so I can refer to it next time I feel myself falling. Thanks.

“ ... not only will Daenerys (Emilia Clarke) and her army make landfall, there’s a battle to be fought.”

Well, there’s a shocker. Especially when you consider Westeros’s long tradition of resolving conflicts without resorting to violence.

Luke finally gets to Tosche Station and we learn what they’re asking for power converters these days. Crazy!

“It was twenty years ago today/Ben Kenobi taught the band to play.”

At what point in the process should you exchange business cards?

It’s not us they’re trying to sell it to: it’s the holdouts in Congress who prevented the last attempt from passing. Some of the key objectors were from the Freedom Caucus, who didn’t like the first bill because it didn’t scratch all their favorite itches. The goal is to win the Freedom Caucus votes by making the bill…

Now I want to read the follow-up article, “What To Do If You’re Attacked By A Navy SEAL, According To A Shark.”

If that’s only Volume One, I think we need to see what happens when they turn it up to Eleven.

Sure, that seems more catastrophic now. But give Theresa May and her friends time. She’s only just getting started.

Some of the magic has gone out of funerals now that we no longer ritually mutilate the bodies of our loved ones before committing them to the grave. It’s like we no longer care whether grandma comes back as a zombie or not.

Movie studios have no ambition. Instead of lazily making remakes, they should be trying to make films so good that someone else will want to remake them.

“Forget it, Jake. It’s Florida.”

No one said it was accurate.

While they do seem to default to middle-aged white-guy (Ash, Bishop, David/Walter), we know that there was at least one young female model (Call). Or are we pretending that “Alien: Resurrection” never happened?

Maybe, maybe not. Bishop himself observed that “The A2s always were a bit twitchy.” Something about that phrase suggests to me that the company may have had to make more than a few out-of-court settlements, probably accompanied by non-disclosure agreements with a hefty penalty clause.

‘Automatic updates’, eh?

• “No, I’m not looking to buy any old lightsabers. Try eBay.”
  

Archers.