In a recent Facebook post, my friend Tony Pierce wrote:

To play the Saint-Saëns bassoon sonata, obviously.

Okay, I put my four-ninety-nine where my mouth is and went to have one of these yesterday. It’s a lot of lettuce and not a lot of flavor. The “pastor” TVP for me never rose above “harmless,” but I suppose I’m accustomed to this kind of thing being approximately one order of magnitude mas picante, what with this being…

For what it’s worth, the MSF sausages aren’t vegan; they’re held together with egg whites.

I have had great vegan meals, but they have mostly been from cuisines that don’t traditionally lean on dairy products, e.g. Taiwanese. On the subject of faux cheese, you and I are in complete agreement.

You know what? Good. When I go to Costco with someone who wants to sit and have a bite before/afterwards, for twenty years my only choice as a vegetarian has been exactly “slice of cheese pizza” or some sort of dessert. It’s nice to have a second option, and honestly, this sounds pretty tasty and moderately nutritious.…

Buddhist Chinese vegetarian restaurants almost always observe the same prohibition on garlic and onions. For instance, you’ll find finely chopped celery standing in for scallions, at least visually.

She chocolate-chimp’d.

“We apologize for that, sir. It won’t happen again.

Came for this. Thank you.

or as the French say,“zaftig”

Came for this.

He was also the best judge on America’s Best Dance Crew.

WINDMILLS DO NOT WORK THAT WAY! GOOD NIGHT!

THREE ROCKS?

It depends on ... where they can build those massive warehouses.

The opening three cuts on Gerry Rafferty’s “City to City” — “The Ark,” “Baker Street,” and “Right Down the Line” — set such an impossibly high standard that the rest of the album almost can’t help but be a letdown.

The towel is there so that steam doesn’t condense on the underside of the lid and drip back down into the rice.

Literally stopped reading at “builds to a crescendo.”

From the headline I naturally assumed “The Met” referred to the opera house and thought, oh, because obviously that wig is going to piss off whoever bought a season ticket for the seat directly behind her.