We all know McDonald’s meat patties can last a very long time, and nowadays McDonald’s restaurants assemble your food only after ordering, but still I have seen their staff throw away food that hasn’t been consumed after what? one hour...  Food wastage is still a thing. Sucks.

That will help supplement my Soros checks.

Hey man if we all had the same taste the world would be a boring old place!

Yeesh that header pic, what am I a dentist?

A few years ago I attended my local state fair that I conveniently lived only a few miles from. Every year there is news coverage for weeks about the next fried monstrosity to be offered for the year, but I went in with only one purpose, and that was to eat a cheeseburger on a donut.

He goes by Thaddeus, geez. We’re actually pretty close. I bought him 5 skull rings for Christmas and he wears them all. I tried to tell them there’s a slightly different one for each day but he wouldn’t hear of it.

Did you just assume his preferred pronoun?

Just bring back the Double-Down already.

*chef’s kiss*

I applaud your determination to make that work..

In my experience bartenders have always refused a tip on my shift drink. That is just a shady bartender who takes it IMO

Wait, he works in a restaurant that doesn’t give free beer to the kitchen? Is this the norm or have I worked in places that are awfully generous?

Shut.The.Fuck.Up.Troll.

Have you no eyes, sir?!

Uhhhh I feel like I should give you a way to contact me because my company would LOVE YOU!

Librarians (at least girls who look like Librarians) have always had a strange amount of power over me.

They really do. I’m kind of in awe of their hubris, but it seems to be working.

The candy bar clutch is what puts it over the top.

If only it were done better. This draping looks more like the product of a beginner playing with fabric than a dress from a fashion house.

Thank you! Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.