To be fair, I’d argue that Taco Bell does not count as a Mexican restaurant.

I worked in a science library at a Christian university during college. Good gig, and I always took the opening (10 am) shift Sunday, because no one would come in, so I could work and do homework/be hung over at my desk.

I worked at a bookstore. In a town. Said bookstore was not in a mall. It was a freestanding building. And that happened twice. Women left their child in my store while they each went to run errands downtown. I told them both that I would call the police if it ever happened again. I am not a free fucking babysitter.…

Im a librarian and we will have kids there till close alone. Its a huge bummer, I work in an area with a really high poverty rate and we make sure everyone has done there homework and I give them snacks from my programs to make sure they have at least eaten something till they get home. The really little ones are…

Yeah, that’s pretty standard shit at a bookstore. I worked at a place that was about a block away from a Cheesecake Factory. Mom and two cute kids in the 4-7 range came in around 11 AM one weekday morning. Mom disappeared shortly thereafter and the two kids hung out in our kids section (which had toys to play with…

I was behind someone at a gas station once who truly did not understand why her three pieces of candy cost more than .99 because the sign clearly said 3/.99. This lady argued with the poor teenager behind the counter for too long. I finally offered the lady a quarter to cover the cost of tax if she would just leave.

Who the hell just lets a fart fly in a restaurant like it’s nothing? I’ll run to the bathroom if I have to.

Lies! I studied economics in college, I use the internet and took at least 2 marketing classes so I know exactly what is going to happen in the future.

Back when I was that age, I’d sing a particular Eric Clapton song as “she don’t lie, she don’t lie... croquet”.

I hate buying bread because if I’m not eating sandwiches every day, it goes moldy before it’s finished. I buy the half loaves, which are MORE expensive than the full ones, but I hate to waste food like that.

I know this doesn’t work for everyone, but a friend of mine and I recently starting sharing produce. It takes some coordination, but we’ve been able to make it work for the most part. Sometimes she’ll text me from the store “If I get this spinach will you take half?” and she will drop it off on her way home.

I own low income rental property in a Midwestern city, and one thing I tell every single tenant when I sign a lease with them is that the minute they think they’ll have trouble with rent, call me and tell me. I can’t make rent cheaper, but I am 100% willing to make a payment plan or at least waive late fees if they…

I had an grad school admissions officer at a large school in Oregon say that to me.

Recently I was in a store and a little boy was blocking an aisle. His mother told him to move out of the way because he wasn’t the only person in the world. Mother of the Year!

The 9/11 lady needs a punch in the taco. Fuck her in every way possible.

This is something I drew years ago...the Holy Carp, complete with tiny Crucifish.

“So, your table stopped me and asked what kind of fish they had was because they thought you were lying to them; I told them it was cod and they asked why we didn’t have real fish.”

It’s our deconstructed caesar!

Here in north County San Diego area, we have this absolutely wonderful burger restaurant called Slater’s 50/50. It’s called that because most of their burger patties are made with 50% ground beef and 50% diced bacon (and it is absolutely WONDERFUL.)

My dad used to have a buddy that owned a high end men’s clothing store. He’d bring him in some fish he had caught & cleaned & filleted, and the guy would let my dad pick out a nice shirt in trade.