I loooove conspiracy theories but nah. She doesn’t even have a butterfly covering one eye and she’s not doing the as above so below Baphomet thing so nah marginal beta sex kitten/ MK-ULTRA  allusions beyond she’s on the cover of Vogue

Wow I feel really persecuted right now

I like crystals and I don’t do dads so it’s really hard for me to relate to her on this one

China is generally fine living with a massive PM2.5 cloud so who knows 

This is the silver lining to the fact that today’s nuclear weapons are 3,000 times more powerful than Little Boy. I saw the Hiroshima Peace Memorial Museum’s displays on radiation sickness and I definitely want to be a vaporized black smudge on the pavement, not have my skin shredded in ribbons and peeling off of me

So what is the deal with photography and court rooms? Is it up to judge discretion?

I totally disagree with that! Marriage is for the most part rather mundane and routine. It’s great but sometimes it’s a bit of a slog. 95% of it (while DINKS, I suspect the number is more like 99.9% after kids) does not involve robust intellectual conversations. You gotta marry someone who makes life easy.

The number has to be declining, right? When I hear Judge Judy I think of my Oma who has been dead over a decade

I bet there is an official hand embiggener on staff

Hey good evening. I saw you edited the Spring to Autumn (are you supposed to capitalize seasons?) but the “but” is irritating me now. If it’s almost autumn already then wouldn’t it be logical to not pass up an good outerwear deal? It is not a contrasting opinion.

Hey good evening. I saw you edited the Spring to Autumn (are you supposed to capitalize seasons?) but the “but” is…

I am a health nut and I tried it and it was pretty good but not great and seemed really processed especially compared to Coconut Bliss but I mentally filed it away as an option for when I’m feeling self-loathing enough to eat a pint of ice cream. It has a purpose!

This is exactly the line of reasoning I used to justify visiting Myanmar under the junta. I think I was right?

My money was on Portland.

I have never been defended before on Jezebel :’) thank you!

It was a really strange reaction though. You vastly overestimated how personally invested I am in you ever getting married. If you want to wait another decade to see if a man decides he wants to marry you can knock yourself out, I’ll just have to cancel our 100% real upcoming married-couples-only Vail trip

idk I think your ex was being honest. His attitude is really common among really successful/alpha types. They get enough competition slaying dragons at work. They want their home life to be simple and nice.

I love these posts

lol sorry I am late but obviously I struck a nerve

He’s 5% as attractive as he thinks he is.

How unfortunate.