Yeah, I am not proud of how long I spent investigating the veracity of that joke.

😦

No central air?? I’d ASK to be evicted if I were Gay Bachelor Robert Sepulveda!!

That was a real treat, thank you for linking to it, and I hope you also heard it in your head in a 1940s gossip columnist’s voice.

I’m deeply grateful that my brother has such a ridiculous name that I will never have that issue. I DO have the issue that he looks a lot like Hollywood celebrity Joseph Gordon Levitt, so any time someone gushes about how hot Joseph Gordon Levitt is I'm just like 😐😐😐.

Well, among women of a certain age, Carols might be tough to avoid.

That adds a whole other layer of strangeness.

I think I might just be varsity-level uptight, ‘cause I’m still stuck on the fact that he would even date someone with the same name as his sister, like can you imagine saying a sibling’s name during sex, ugh.

Wait, Bieber took his girl to Japan? Isn’t trafficking a minor across international borders for sexual purposes a felony??

But “yes, miss” aloud just sounds like it’s the feast day of St. Yes! And it presumes marital status!! This whole thread is making me terrified to ever visit the UK, ‘cause apparently people will bite my head off for trying to be polite.

I would literally cry if someone stole my Diet Coke and there wasn't at least one other (COLD) one in the fridge. Lunch theft and fucking with someone's caffeine are equally serious felonies.

Firmly disagree re: the whale. Just think of how small a whale is in the context of the ocean, and what that thought might teach us about the relative importance of a royal toddler in the modern era.

I had no idea Madonna stole HER Sexy Boy Scout look from them.

I just want to show my appreciation for @Starbucks hoping her drink was still “as good as it gets.”

I made an ex delete one a few months ago...I told him I needed it gone for my peace of mind because an identifiable tattoo of mine was visible for a few seconds, but tbh I was just gravely offended that despite his earlier statement that, quote, “omg this is so hot, I’m going to watch it like every day forever babe,”…

That eye makeup is v fresh and makes your eyes pop (like in a playful, willful way), in my opinion.

“...but rather the most sexiest too.”

His name WAS Chance, and they named the clone Second Chance, obvi.

Reading that first story felt like a punch to the gut. I am so, so, so sorry that happened to you, and I hope that kid thought back on it years later and felt like absolute shit. But maybe that’s just my irrational belief in human decency talking.

Whoooaaa.
That looks like an autopsy photo where the cause of death is "a dinosaur laid eggs on her chest, smushing her heart like a grape."