Money can't buy happiness? Bullshit. You know what money can buy you? A fucking waverunner. You ever see people frowning while they are on a god damn waverunner? No, you don't.

Hold on Barry, you actually expect me to believe that the NFL knew about a problem and failed to act on it?

When Bill Bellichick heard the news of this report earlier tonight, he promptly fired the team's equipment manager for failing to do his fucking job right by not under-inflating that 12th goddamned football.

I like how some people have been using the -ghazi suffix to replace -gate. Feels more current. However, I propose a simple rule. We reserve -gate for actual scandals, since Watergate was serious business, as well as an actual scandal and conspiracy. We reserve -ghazi for frivolous bullshit drummed up by people with an…

WHY DO I ONLY HAVE 10 DAYS NOTICE? Do you realize how much work I have to take off right now to watch all of Top Gear?!

Leave his joke alone.

To help prevent Rodgers from getting caught, Mike McCarthy takes the air out of the ball at the end of the game.

Throwing hats is okay, jerseys isn't? The message is clear: praise is allowed, criticism isn't.

I hereby protest this lousy hockey team by tossing the jersey I paid $85 for (before customization, which was another $50) on to your ice! This of course does not count the $110 I spent on the game ticket to get into the arena, the $20 to park my car, and the other $25 I spent on booze to work up the nerve to toss the…

Your jersey is not a flag and it should not be treated as such. If a jackass wants to toss it on the ice in protest because the franchise is a tire fire, so be it. Kick him / her out, ban them from the arena, rub their nose in shit...whatever. But let's not act like this is some grave display of disrespect.

But Toronto PD clarifies that the men were not arrested, merely ejected, ticketed, and banned.

This is why we have sports, right here.

So what you're saying is that football coverage is refreshingly devoit of the horseshit mountain of sanctimony baby boomer writers shovel onto the rotting carcass of MLB?

You know what's funny? There is possible tampering/cheating going on from a team to reach the Superbowl. The NFL is like "Yea, we'll look into it." The fans are like "LOL New England. What do you expect? It's Tom Brady and Bill Belicheat."

You have to respect this level of premeditated trolling. Walton ordered the book, brought it to the game, waited for his chance on live tv.

The Germans do indeed have a sense of humor.

BEWARE! Guard Dog On Duty!

Atheists take the diametrically opposed stance, arguing that there's no reason to believe that a supreme being exists.

Well, that was an enlightening read. I guess I fall in the agnostic atheist category, then. I think all religion is man-made, but I cannot prove it. At the same time, I'm open to the unknown, though I consider myself a skeptic.

It irritates me to no end that people equate atheism with "god does not exist". That's not what atheism means. It simply means "I don't believe god (or gods) exist". That's all. You either believe or you don't. You are either a theist or an atheist. The word does not provide or claim proof. It is a statement of…