Haha, well, it sounds like you're luckily very compatible. I'm short, so I regularly fuck people more than a foot taller than me. It's just not going to happen

I already hate 69ing because I'm 5 feet tall, so most of my sex partners are much taller than me. If someone was also trying to reach my vag at the same time? No way

I feel like, height wise, 69ing is hard enough to organize. Can you imagine the logistics of this if one participant is significantly shorter or taller than the others?

Oh yeah, I remember this. I got a lot of eyerolls when I pointed it out to them. 3 women vs. 33 men in the office, I guess they trump us.

Listening to my co-workers complain, I was under the impression that we’re cold ALL THE TIME. Maybe it’s just that we’re used to it?

I’m not of the opinion that all homophobes are closeted, self-hating, gay people. I think that’s a damaging narrative. I AM however, of the opinion that most of the people who believe that being gay is a choice are actually bisexual. And I’m doubly of the opinion that homophobes who claim that allowing gay…

nothing quite so horrible as this, but my dad corrected my first grade teacher’s spelling on parent night in the first couple of weeks of school (she had spelled tomato with an e). Knowing my dad, he probably wasn’t particularly tactful about it. To be fair, first grade teachers should probably spell our spelling…

I was going to say, didn’t she physically abuse him? I’m not rooting for her at all.

I know who Jonathan Swift is, but I’m still chosing to believe that this poem was written by Taylor Swift, because it makes me laugh so so hard.

Oh, I didn’t realize that she wasn’t just generally under contract to Sony. that makes more sense, though it’s still incredibly shitty.

But he can’t possibly produce every single album that Sony puts out, right? And it’s not like they’re making any money off of her now.

Make me two! Adele is incredibly talented, but it’s not really my genre of music. I don’t get why they can’t use one of the 6 zillion other producers out there besides Dr. Luke.

Also, it’s probably a harder sell, but there’s also this

I’m lucky. My dearest childhood dream was an easy-bake oven. It’s a lot cheaper wish fulfillment than your fish tank coffee table.

It’s not too late!

An ex told me he had terminal cancer to get me to keep having sex with him. I didn't fuck him, but I did believe he had cancer

I’m pretty sure it was just the toy companies realizing how much money they could make if you had to buy all new toys if you had a child of a different gender than the first.

My mom has been married 3 times, and the only last name she didn’t take was my fathers. So she’s had 2 last names since I’ve been alive, neither of them matching mine. It has never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever in the 26 years that I’ve been alive, caused an issue.

I went to sleep away camp with sisters who had different last names because the parents agreed to alternate. I had a second of “huh, I’ve never heard of doing that” and then never thought about it again. So your parents may side-eye it, but I can’t imagine the kids will care

I’m not sure if you’re kidding, but I’m pretty sure he’s standing in front of some kind of sun shaped clock or wall art, so what you’re actually seeing is the rays of the sun.