haha, when you do, let him know the picture is about a year old, and the bottom shelf is totally full now.

my skin has been getting bumps (it’s weird, they aren’t pimples, it’s just...bumpy) on my forehead so I’ve vowed to start exfoliating in the shower. My previous regimine was taking my makeup off sometime in the 48 hours after I first applied it, if I didn’t rub it all off on its own. It’s only been a couple days, but…

My nailpolish collection:

I am white as fuck. Like, nearing sheet of paper white, with pinky undertones which makes it even harder. The only thing that has ever worked for me is Bobbi Brown’s liquid foundation in alabaster. They have it in some sephora’s, but if your local one doesn’t carry it, they also have it in Nordstroms, and I think Lord…

When I was a kid, I used to cover a plate in shredded cheese, then microwave it until it was melted, and eat it with a fork. so I mean, I’m team puddle of cheese here, though I can see why a restaurant would balk at serving it to me.

God, it must really be awful for those creators to have a bunch of people on the internet making assumptions about their intentions and criticizing them publicly. Good thing it’s only on twitter though, imagine if there was a whole app, just for that!

I worked at a sharper image before they went out of business, and people used to think we were brookstone all. The. Time. I once had to beg, BEG a woman who had come into the store to return a product we had never sold WITH A RECEIPT THAT SAID BROOKSTONE to just walk right down the hall 3 storefronts to return her…

I love love love nails inc. They’ve finally started shipping to the US, and I’m so excited.

I guess at least you were in final descent, so everyone could escape quickly? silver lining?

you regularly find other people’s vomit in your seatback pocket? That’s definitely not normal

I assumed she meant the announcers were being mean spirited. The article didn’t come off as mean spirited (if a little sarcastic) to me.

I was too busy screeching about it into the phone at my mother, who lives 300 miles away, and could do nothing about the situation, because I’m really good at rational responses.

oh my god, yes, I try to reason with the dog constantly. And when he’s begging for food, I always tell him he can have something other than kibble when he gets a job and pays for it himself. But that freeloader doesn’t listen at all.

I don’t know, I started shouting “just fly out the damn door!” at the bird I found in my kitchen the other morning, and it eventually listened to me. After flying into the closed window about a hundred times, of course, but it did eventually learn.

It’s also an episode of community, and while those characters aren’t quite the sociopaths that the people on It’s Always Sunny are, they also really aren’t known for their great decision making skill.

I think the only person required to have a facebook account is the person “reviewing” you. so no, I don’t think you can avoid this total shitstorm by not being on facebook, which is nuts.

Why is Ryan Murphy trying so hard to convince us Lea Michelle can be convincingly ugly?

My mom made the mistake of keeping her eyedrops and her toe fungus medication next to each other on the shelf. I’m sure she wishes the mistake she made was putting eye drops on her toes, but nope! toe fungus medication in the eye. I don’t recommend it. I also don’t recommend keeping similar looking but very different…

yeah, and what if someone not HIV positive cut themselves? I really really really hope they aren’t just going to shrug and go “well, he doesn’t have HIV, we’re probably fine”