I wish. I'm traumatized for life. Even midget double amputee porn doesn't do it for me.

Sterling also states that his girlfriend is free to sleep with black men, as long as she doesn't bring them to Clippers games (or appear with them on Instagram).

So which of the four are you?

That is why you do not have kids, hire a cleaning lady and eat out... and if you feel like cooking, use FreshDirect to deliver the food.

You forgot the gays, which turn former ghettos with high murder rates into beautifully rehabbed neighborhoods for everyone else.

Or get it for free from McDonald's with the purchase of a value meal once or twice a year.

Contrary to what other commenters are saying, this is the best glass for coke!

Son, why did you send that pic to me?

My entire inbox looks like that. Here is the most recent voicemail.

Pretty sure the only thing they're trying to hide is their incompetence.

Not so sure. I've spent two hours in an Uber trying to go from 29th to 45th at 7 PM. Would need a lot of farm towers.

Technically impossible, though. Would provide too much overlap at the center of earth and too many gaps at the top of the sky.

Ellen recently made a public statement about she didn't know her and Portia were getting divorced until she read about it in the tabloids... and that she was sad to find out that she is getting divorced.

I was diagnosed with Crohn's Disease at 15.

So it's like a gay bath house... but for everyone?

Mine writes for large publications that rank better than anything I could ever come up with. Although my Twitter does outrank all. I have my name for my Twitter handle and mine recently pissed some people off and I got the blowback on Twitter from people tagging without checking.

Baltimore has old infrastructure, too. In fact, many of the water pipelines downtown (even those serving high rises) are wood. Then there are the common exploding manhole covers due to the ancient electrical infrastructure.

Don't forget about how much programming Comcast controls as well.

MTA isn't paying, but even if they were, what's great for tourists is great for NYC.